The family was gathered for a pleasent dinner and Mina was chatting animatedly with Gabriel and Toulan about a variation of a play they had developed that day. She felt very much at ease around the children and to her surprise she enjoyed spending time with them. She had never really had any play mates when she was a kid so in a way she was taking it back now. Nyssa and she were getting along very well even though her lessons were an endless source of frustration. She had never experienced anything as wonderful as saidar and she very much wanted to be able to touch it when ever she wanted. But no, she had a block and getting her to the state where she could channel was an unpleasent business. She had to be angry and usually they had to resort to either her past or just waiting until she was stymied enough to reach saidar. She was determined that the block would be gone soon.

 

Mary had been dining with them as usual and when she started gathering the used plates and utensils, Mina got up to help her. She actually liked doing household chores and she usually washed the dishes after every meal. It didn't surprise her that Leon stood too since he had started to help her by rinsing and drying the dishes. She couldn't understand why the adults found it so hilarious. In fact, she had come to the conclusion that Leon's behaviour on the day she had arrived had been some strange brain fart. After that he had been perfectly normal and well-mannered. Mary had warned her about his pranks but there hadn't been a single one of them. Her wariness because of his gender was starting to get subdued and it was kind of rediculous anyway since he was only fourteen, a total brat. Sure, he was physically more developed for his years than most adolescent boys she had seen but he was too young to think that kind of things. Therefore she was perfectly safe and if she would live in the house for the rest of her training, he would likely think of her as a kind of a sister by then which made it double safe.

 

Leon opened her the door to the kitchen and rushed to lay down his pile of kitchen wares to help Mina with hers. She didn't resist since she didn't want to drop the dishes but she snorted derisively as he laid his hands over hers as he took hold of the pile and put it down. "Well thank you for doing what I could have perfectly well done myself, Leon." She shook her head as she set up the basins and filled them with water mixing the boiling and cold water expertly. But since he was actually helpful, she turned to smile at him and decided to make amends. "It is really nice that you are helping me out with the dishes, though." There wasn't that much of them since there were only seven eaters but she appreciated the gesture.

 

Leon dropped the top plates and the forks and knives to the soap water in front of her and managed to brush her shoulder and side in the process. The first physical contacts had startled her and made her uncomfortable at first but since they continued, she had decided that he was just a bit clumsy. It had to be the growing phase; she had felt like her body wasn't her own and in her control when she had been gaining height. They started the washing and rinsing, him touching her hand every time she passed him soapy plates. "So, what have you been doing today, Leon?", she asked feeling somewhat social.

 

Mina

Dreadlady in training

Sitting at dinner quietly, Leon ate his meal in relative silence except when his mother or father had something to say and even then his answers were short though polite.  If he had been more attentive, he might have noticed the looks that his mother and father exchanged during the dinner, but his attention was wholly taken by the other conversation at the table.  Mina was talking to his brother and sister, about the play that they'd changed today they'd made a variation of or some such.  Leon didn't really know much about it, he'd spent most of the day working with his lathe except when he'd been needed for chores.

 

It had been like that ever since Mina had come to their house, and if Leon were honest with himself, he didn't know why.  They'd barely talked at all, despite that Leon felt the urge to see what she was up to during the day, to make sure she was alright he told himself.  She was new to the house, mother had said to not play a single joke or prank on her and he hadn't.  For some reason he found himself finding excuses to help her where he could, wanting her to notice him yet not wanting her to at the same time. 

 

It was torturous, and the fact it was so frustrating was something that he found difficult to get a grasp of.  He'd never had any sort of doubt in himself like this until now, and it made no sense!  But he couldn't ask anyone, if they did then they would know and Leon trusted his instinct that he definitely shouldn't tell anyone.  If he asked Toulan or Gabriel about it, they'd find a way to use it to get back at him for all the time he'd played jokes on them, but this wasn't something he could laugh off.

 

Mary was there to collect the plates.  As Mina began to help, Leon started collecting plates as well.  He didn't want her to think that he was lazy, so he quickly shouldered his burden and got to the door before Mina so he could open it for her.  Waiting until she was clear, he then quickly put his plates down on the bench then took hers off her and put them besides his.  Wincing at the comment, he was glad she couldn't see his face as he quickly forced the feeling back down.

 

The next comment helped put wind back in his sails though.  Taking up a dishrag, he dried everything that was passed to him as Mina cleaned them and passed them to him.  He kept trying to think of something to say, but he didn't want to say something then look like an idiot.  That in turn annoyed him, he had never worried about what he said or did, he just went ahead with it, why now?

 

Perking up as Mina asked him a question, Leon answered quickly.  "Swordwork."  That was about as far as he was willing to venture but then he realised that he'd look stupid if he didn't say something.  "What did you do?"

 

 

Leon Daemeau

Felonius Fourteen

Leon was a quiet one and beside being clumsy, he seemed a little shy. It was quite disarming, Mina decided with a smile. "That's interesting. Your mother thinks that I should learn to use the blade too." So far the beginning of her training had been hampered by the fact that Michael would be her tutor and even though she could be in the house at ease around him, she wasn't certain if she wanted to get into physical contact with him yet. Nyssa hadn't pressed the matter but sooner or later she would. Then another possibility dawned at her and she grinned at Leon. "Would you be interested to show me some of the basics? You seemed to be handling yourself pretty well with Duram at least." She tilted her head and regarded him. "Aren't you ever... well, worried when with him? He is a Fors... Chosen after all." Not that he behaved like a one and she was still half disbelieving the whole thing. It still befogged her that they all were darkfriends and still they were more normal and nicer than any Light lovers she had ever met.

 

"Uncle Duram?"  Leon looked up at Mina sharply before turning back to his plates as he spoke.  "No, I've known him since I was five.  The first time I met him a hit him in the crotch with my play sword because I thought he was going to hurt mum."  The sound that came from Mina made him blush.  "He managed to forgive me that because I was trying to protect mum, I don't think there is really much worse I could do. He's always been here since then, usually once a month and when he's here we go and practice with lathes for awhile and talk and stuff.  He's Chosen but he's not like the others, they're all high and mighty and 'look at me!'  But Uncle Duram is different, I don't know why but he is." A little embaressed by how he'd just blabbered on, he remembered what she'd said before.  "I could, but I'm still learning.  Dad's still a lot better than me."

 

She had to work hard to stiffle her disbelieving giggle at Leon's confession. Having witnessed herself what damage knee on a man's groin could do, he was likely right that he had done his worst and was none the worse off for it. "Oh, what do you talk about? And have you actually met some of the other Chosen or has he just talked about them? Were any of them actually bound to the Shayol Ghul or was that just Lightfool propaganda?"  She waved her hand dismissively at his suggestion that Michael would teach her. "And you're more than half better than I am so you can teach me just fine, I'm sure." She grinned. "I'm a quick study so I'll catch up fast. And when I'll beat you up, then I might start learning from your father."

 

"Beat me?  Never." Grinning as he finished the last of the dishes, Leon put the dish rag away as he added.  "Come to the beach tomorrow, I'll bring the lathes and I'll show you how to use them.  Its easy." Ducking out of the kitchen before he said something stupid, he saw that the others were already gone from the dining room.  Mum would probably be reading with his brother and sister while dad was in the study, so he went straight to his room.  It was early, but the earlier he got to sleep, the sooner tomorrow would come.  It'd be the best day ever.

 

Laughing at his ballsy response, Mina stayed in the kitchen a bit longer to sweep the tables before she headed to listen Nyssa read to the kids. It was nice to have connected with Leon too and she was looking forward to the next day. It could be fun.

 

Mina & Leon

The day had taken too long to come, Leon had even woken up earlier than usual but he'd waited until Mary had gotten up before getting his breakfast.  Finishing it when the others had begun to turn up, he'd gotten his lathes and made his way down to the beach as quickly as he could.  He warmed up like dad and uncle Duram had shown him, he began practicing and making sure he knew his forms right so he knew what he was doing when Mina came.  If he was going to be teaching her, he wanted to make sure he got it right.  Uncle Duram always said that you had to learn it right the first time no matter how long it took, otherwise you'd have to unlearn and relearn later.

 

It was an hour or two before Mina showed up, the sun had clearly broken away from the horizon but it was a little chilly all the same with the sea breeze carrying the morning cold.  He was used to it though, he'd lived here all his life and according to dad, it was nothing like the Borderlands far to the north.  Apparently they were really cold, light cursed cold though dad had used a different word altogether to describe it that Leon had never heard before when he came back from a trip there.  Leon assumed it was bad though because his father had immediately told him never to repeat the phrase and, more importantly, never tell mother that he'd said it within earshot of Leon.

 

Waving to her, Leon handed her a lathe a bit bigger than his own when she came close since she was half a foot taller than him.  Giving her a moment to look it over, he began to explain what to do.  "Just copy what I do, this is how you hold it.  Right hand over and above your left, bend your knees like I am.  It feels weird at first, but you'll get used to it.  Now, watch me, I'll show you how to slash, make sure you step with each slash."

 

His right foot leading, he stepped forward with his left and pivoted as he slashed from his top left to bottom right, then he stepped forward with his right and mirrored the movement.  A few other slashes that were just at different angles followed, and when he was done, he looked to her.  "When you step forward, the power from all your body goes in the swing, and if you step forward and do this."  Leon showed a thrust as he stepped.  "Your body is all behind it as well.  You don't just use your arms, you use everything to get more power.  Try it.  Once you've got the hang of it, we'll try and spar, sparring allows you to find out how good you are."

 

 

Leon Daemeau

Felonius Fourteen

Mina had gotten up earlier than usual and still she was worried that she would be late from her and Leon's first lesson. Her mornings were free so they would have a plenty of time before Nyssa started preparing her to a channeling mood. The sun was up already when she made her way to the beach alternatively yawning and shivering in the cold sea wind. The boy was already there with the wooden practice swords and she responded his wave with enthusiasm.

 

When Leon handed her the lathe, it was harder than it seemed to assume just the right kind of a stance and balance. Leon corrected her many times and demonstrated practically how easy she was to get off her feet by pushing against her weak line what ever that was. It was hard to coordinate both her hands and feet at the same time and she was certain her slashes looked as awkward as they felt like. Luckily there weren't that many of them to learn but she didn't seem to get them just right.

 

She had long since broken a sweat and her hands were starting to feel leaden and slightly shaky when Leon told her that she was doing decently now and showed her some basic defenses against all the cuts, the simplest being just a step off the line of opponent's attack and responding with an attack of your own. That she could surely do but the defenses felt cumbersome and slipped off her mind and she couldn't predict well enough which cut he was doing.

 

They went at slow enough speed that she didn't even feel threatened by his weapon but she was starting to get to the point of frustration by the time he declared that it was time for the fun and she'd get to apply what she had practiced. A small water break later once she had wiped the sweat off he face, they were ready and faced each others off in a guard stance. Outwardly Mina's face was utterly blank and her eyes were slightly glazed with concentration but she could feel her pulse quickening and fear of hurt sent adrenaline coursing through her veins. She tried to keep in mind Leon's advice to be relaxed but she was coiled for action like an overly exerted spring. It was just a friendly little practice spar to Leon but she took it as seriously as if her life really was endangered.

 

She had watched Pander's guards practice a few times and they had done dirty little tricks. As Leon lunged his first attack, she neatly sidestepped him but instead of hitting him with her lathe, she pivoted and kicked sand into his eyes. As he cried out in shock and blinked furiously trying to dig the grains out with his one hand, she descended upon him like a fury snarling wordlessly. She directed a vicious kick on his knee and while his foot collapsed under him, she hit him on the skull with a loud crack that would leave a tender lump. She pommeled ferociously his hand that still held the blade until the grip loosened and planted a fist on his face. Blood spurted from his nose and he screamed from the pain. A hard kick on the side wheezed all breath out of him as he collapsed on the ground and she made sure he stayed there by planting her knee and her whole weight on his midrift. She grabbed the lathe with both hands and brought it to a chokehold on his throat. She looked down upon him with a grin that was positively insane and whispered hoarsely "You're dead."

 

For a while the wooden blade continued to block his breath and she just stared with unseeing eyes at his bulging brown ones. Then she blinked and blinked some more and cried out herself. She snatched her hands off the lathe as it was a hot poker and crawled off from him staring in horror as he struggled to get as far away from her as possible. "No, no, no", she uttered brokenly and reached out a hand at him. "Leon... I didn't mean to... please don't go..."

 

Mina

More than a bit touched in the head

 

He was going to die.

 

The thought had never crossed his mind until this moment, but he knew it now, he was dead.  Sand in his eyes so he couldn't see then he'd been down on the ground and his hand had been brutally battered as he tried to raise his lathe to protect himself.  He thought it was her fist that hit him in the nose, he wasn't sure but he could feel a warmth on his face and his head was ringing from a blow from a lathe.  He'd fallen on the ground unable to breath and she had fallen ontop of him like she was now, holding her lathe at his throat.  It didn't matter that it was wood, she'd smash his head like a watermelon or choke him o-

 

The weight was off his chest.

 

Scrambling back as quickly as he could, he didn't hear anything except the pounding of his heart as he turned and scrabbled to his feet.  While she was stronger than him, he could outrun her, he knew he could.  Running down the beach, he ran and he ran and he ran with his fear to carry him and it wasn't until his legs burned with agony and his lungs could draw no more air that he finally fell down.  Unable to run and sob at the same time, he traded in the former for the latter.

 

He couldn't understand, couldn't even think, what had happened?  Everything hurt, and he couldn't breath properly with his nose stuffed with blood and gunk.  Getting to his feet after awhile, he walked to the water and washed his nose out and was thankful that it hadn't been broken.  His hand was what really hurt though, he didn't think anything was broken but if it wasn't then it had only fallen just short.  It hurt to move, but all those physical pains paled to what was going on inside of him.

 

Why?  What had he done?  He didn't understand it and he didn't understand Mina.  For some reason he'd wanted her to like him, to notice him, he'd done everything right that he was meant to do and she'd nearly killed him!

 

What if she was waiting for him?

 

He needed to go, somewhere else, but everything he had was in the house.  He needed a weapon, he needed food, he needed other things.  He could ask dad for help, they'd gone camping a few times, maybe dad would help him.  After all he was fourteen now, dad would let him do it he was sure of it.

 

So it was that Leon snuck back to the house, making sure to get to his room unseen first of all.  He needed warmer clothes, new ones that weren't coated in sand and blood.  Wait, he would have to take those with him or someone would know.  No one could know, he didn't want anyone to know what happened.  It was him she hated, not the others.  Gloves, he also needed gloves to hide his hand.  His hair took care of the lump on his skull and his nose was just a bit red and bruised, not uncommon for him with the grazes and falls he occasionally had while climbing trees.

 

It took a bit, but soon he was ready to talk to his dad.  It didn't take much for Leon to convince him, he wasn't sure why, but his father agreed to help him get set up a bit away from the manor.  Help him with a shelter, food and everything.  And for the first time, Leon hid something serious from his father, which made him feel worse but better that his father didn't know how badly he'd been beaten.  After all his training, he should have been able to defend himself but he couldn't.

 

It was little over an hour later when they left, and they made their way to the nearby wood north of the manor...

 

 

Leon Daemeau

Felonius Fourteen

Leon scrambled on his feet and ran like the Wild Hunt was after him and Mina knew that she couldn't catch him even if she tried. And he likely wouldn't even listen to her now and who could blame him. She wasn't sure if she could stand, so shocked and appalled she was with herself. This was exactly what had been done to her, an unpexpected and unprovoked attack. Leon would be hurting from that as well and maybe the broken trust was even more painful than his physical injuries; she had felt it still even after all those years, hoping and praying that he had changed this time and always disappointing. Pander had been a monster and now she had become just like him. Maybe she should just end her sorry life and prevent herself from ever hurting anyone else. She was out of control and insane and who knew when she would next snap.

 

She wasn't even sure how badly she had hurt Leon, the fight was buried in a red fog but he had been able to move and quickly. And he would go to his mother and be Healed. She closed her eyes with pain when she thought of Nyssa's and Michael's reactions. They would hate her and be revulsed and she would be cast out. They had been the best thing that had ever happened to her and she had ruined it. She had believed that she had escaped the darkness, left it behind her as she entered a new life but it had come back to haunt her and she knew that could never be rid of it. The vileness was inside her, just waiting when she would slip to take control. But she would never loose it again. And Duram wouldn't give her a chance; he did not tolerate insane followers and she was mad as a hatter. She had betrayed his protection by attacking one of his and she would be put down like a wild beast. And she deserved it. She would have to go back and face them all and it would be her punishment.

 

But not yet, it would be far too easy. Wrapping her arms around herself and rocking herself back and forth she gave in to the tears and flagellated herself mentally by forcing herself to remember everything that had been done to her. Every hurt, all the pain and her own reactions, the fear and submission and certainty that this time he would kill her and how she had even embraced it at times. This is what you did to Leon, this is how he felt, she reminded herself. When she was through the years of agony, she felt like a numb husk, hollowed inside of all the bad memories that seemed to be everything there was. Now she could go back and bear Nyssa's anger. She had no idea what time it was but likely she was already late from her lessons. Only today there would be no lessons since she would have heard from Leon what had happened and Duram would be summoned to take her at hand.

 

She tried to clean herself as well as she could but she knew that she looked as miserable as she felt. Every step back to the house felt more leaden than the other and she grew more and more afraid of what was waiting for her.

 

Mina

A Guilty Dreadlady Acolyte

It had been a week of nightmares for Mina after the beating quite literally also and she had went through the whole caleidoscope of emotions. It had really set her off balance to find out that Leon had not said a word of it to his parents before being allowed to go camping in the woods all alone. That fool of a boy hadn't gotten any Healing but he had to be alright or Michael would have spotted something. The burden of the confession had been left entirely on her shoulders and she had almost done it a countless times when the guilt had grown to gigantic measures. The most painful moments were when the members of the family were especially nice to her; it made her want to scream them to get away from her because she was dangerous and come clean. Maybe it was chickening but she had come to dream and hope that maybe her punishment was living with the guilt for the rest of her life and not getting sent away. And she had rationalized that she would have to at least find out why Leon hadn't hissed a word before she told Nyssa. In reality she just wanted to stay with the family and never leave. Something in her had opened up and she craved for their gentless as much as it pained her because of what she had done.

 

She had tried to behave as normal as possible after the day she had found out that no one knew and she had told Nyssa everything about her past. She had the nagging suspicion that Nyssa and Michael were aware that something was going and from the way she kept glancing at Leon's empty seat at the dinner table and her worry for him being out there on his own, they might think that she having some tender feeling for him. She was quite angry at them for not seeing what was happening under their very noses and for letting him to leave like that.

 

When Mary had been sent to take him food after a week, she had persuaded the maid to let her do that instead. She had gotten good instructions on how to find the meeting place and there she was now with the abundant ratios waiting for Leon to show up. She sat on the ground nervously glancing around from under her black hood. From the way Leon had run from her, she feared that he might dart off again if he saw that it was her and not Mary or his mother. She didn't know how long she had waited but finally she picked his form approaching. She gripped the handle of the basket anxiously and waited until he was quite close before standing and throwing back the hood. He looked pretty normal and well and a weight dropped off her heart.

 

"Leon, I'm so sorry", she said intently but she doubted that he heard her say anything but his name as he bolted and turned to run away from her as fast as he could. Desperation settled in and she sprinted after him. "I'm sorry", she yelled to his back. "I just want to speak with you! I had to see that you are alright! Why didn't you tell your parents what happened?!"

 

But he was too fast for her as fear gave him wings and she realized with desperation that trying to catch him just made him more frightened of her. She had to try still since she couldn't bear to wait another week to be able to bring more food. That was the only reliable way to find him since he knew the forest and she did not. Of course he would have to come back to the house at some point but it could take as long as a month. Or maybe he was of the mind to wait here until she was gone. She would have to find out and they would speak.

 

She ran as fast as she could and had no air left to call him to stop anymore. He was clearly in more fit condition than her even if her longer legs gave her some advantage. They ran and ran and she was getting throughoutly lost and her lungs begun to burn from the exhaustion. Her legs couldn't carry her fast enough and the distance between them started to grow. He would get away and then she would be left in middle of the forest alone. She gathered her resolve and forced herself to lunge forward. It was the most important thing to catch him and resolve this. The new vigour was quickly spent, though and she would have scremed from disappointment if she had had any breath left. He couldn't go, she had to speak with him. In her despair she prayed the Wheel, the Great Lord and even the uncaring bloody Creator; she reached for something, anything and that moment she surrendered completely. All the barriers and fears were gone for a moment as she had only one thought left in her head and saidar winked to life around her, filling her with its bliss. She reveled in it and using more need and will than skill, she directed the power at Leon.

 

She could see a momentary flash of blue at his feet and his speed halted as he fell like a falling tree all the suddenly. Untrained, she could not hold on to saidar very long and the world felt duller and bland in colours all the suddenly. But even that couldn't quell her joy of catching him and she rushed to him. Leon was struggling to get on his feet but he seeemed to have hurt his knee, there was even blood so he must have hit it on a stone or something. He tried to limp away but she followed him persistently.

 

"Please Leon, stop. I don't want to hurt you. I just want to talk." But he wasn't listening and finally she had no choice but to charge him and take him to a bear hug. They collapsed to the ground and she wrapped her legs and arms tightly around him and not a second too late as he went wild. He kicked and flailed and bit but she held on making soothing sounds and assuring him repeatedly that was not going to hurt him. Her limbs were growing tired when his struggle finally slowed.

 

"Shush now, Leon sweetie. I will not harm you. I am so sorry, so very sorry. Are you alright, please tell me that you are? You should have gone to your mother for Healing. You should have told them both what happened. I don't understand. Why didn't you? Why leave when I'm the one you should have left?"

 

Mina

Dreadlady Acolyte

"GET OFF ME!"

 

Struggling to get free as Mina's arms wrapped themselves around him even as her legs pinned his own, it was a fear as well as hate that drove him as his entire body convulsed repeatedly in desperate resistance against the woman who was holding him.  His skin crawled at her touch even as he strained against her, weak curses flowing from his lips with a savage tongue because they were the worst things he even knew to say.  He wanted her off him, he wanted to get away from her and wished he his feet hadn't betrayed him in the first place.

 

He didn't even realise it but tears were running down his face as he lost his presence of mind.  The more animalistic side of his nature had taken over, trying to claw at her, pinch, bite, headbutt, anything.  Too big though, too big, he couldn't get out and he felt like he was suffocating.  His skin breaking out in muscle and sinew that threatened to explode, every cell and molecule that made up his entire being fought against Mina's grasp.

 

But he couldn't.

 

Panic overtook Leon as his attempts at freedom found failure, a phobia that deepened as he began to wear out and knew that he wasn't going to be able to keep it up.  A new burst of adrenaline at the though gave him renewed strength but it wilted quickly.  Fearful, exhausted, helpless, he couldn't stop shaking as her hold on him remained firm.  Couldn't defend himself, couldn't get away, nothing to do and not knowing what would happen were enough to let his imagination run wild.  She'd almost killed him before, now she was going to finish it.  He didn't want to die, more than anything he wanted his mother.

 

He could hear her talking, he couldn't really make it out, it seemed warbled and he couldn't focus on it.  His lips were moving without thought, stuttering as he repeated the same thing as more tears flowed.  "P-p-ple-ese don' k-kill me..."

 

 

Leon Daemeau

Felonius Fourteen

It was obvious from Leon's stumbling plea that he hadn't heard a word from what Mina had said. The only blessing was that he was as tired as she and likely could not crawl away. She was determined that they would sort this out now but she also worried that he might have hurt himself the way he had fought.

 

"Leon, listen to me. I will not hurt you." Her closeness to him likely increased his fear but she couldn't let him go yet. She released one arm from around him and brought it to his hair caressing them. "Calm down now, Leon. Everything is going to be well. I will leave, do you hear me?"

 

Leon couldn't even bring himself to move as one of her arms disentangled themselves.  Flinching as her hand touched his head, he tried to still himself but he couldn't stop it.  Couldn't get a grasp of himself, couldn't hold onto anything.  All he could do was listen and try to understand as she spoke.  Trying to tell him to calm down, that she was going to leave.  He didn't even know where the words came from as he responded.  "N-no yo-ou won'.  Co-come back.  Di-didn't mean to."

 

She understood the part about winning but the rest of it was uncomprehendible to her. "What I did was unacceptable, Leon", she said fiercely. "I lost and I lost myself and the right to stay with your family. You are coming home with me now and your mother will Heal you. And then I am going to leave."

 

Clenching his fists to try and stop the shaking, it didn't come close to working and a new wave of weariness led to him unclasping them anyway.  He didn't even understand what she was talking about, going home with her and his mother healing him, then her leaving.  She'd tried to kill him!  Now she was going to take him to his mother, who he'd hidden it from to begin with?  "N-no you ar-aren't.  K-kill me l-like before."

 

Leon was starting to try her temper but his resistance to come with her was understandable. He expected her to attack him again any moment. "I am not going to lay a hand on you ever again, Leon", she assured with a forced patience. "I never wanted to hurt you at all... hard to believe now, I know and you can never forgive me." She released her limbs from around him and moved to sit on the ground a small distance from him. She winced as she felt the bruises from his kicks and hits. "There is no excuse for what I did but you deserve to know why. You arouse old bad memories. I could never defend myself then but no one is going to hurt me ever again. You triggered that instict and I have never regretted anything more."

 

"I need you to look at me. I know you don't want to ever see me again and I swear that after this you won't."

 

Hearing her speak of not hurting him, Leon didn't know what to think when he felt her release him and move away.  He couldn't bear to look up, he wanted to run but he knew he wouldn't get away, couldn't get away.  She'd let him away before only because she could get him when she wanted, she was here now.  Yet when she said that if he looked up she would go for good, he was tempted to believe, enough to look up at here.

 

Mina & Leon

It took him some time to decide but finally he gazed hesitantly at her. She met his eyes firmly. "Good. Now keep looking", she told him even as she turned her back at him and looked at him over her shoulder. She worked quickly to undo her buttons and lowered her shirt to the small of back to reveal her badly scarred ugly back. "The straight scars are from a lash and the round ones are burn wounds", she stated flatly as she covered herself again. "That's the kind of treatment that breeds insanity and I'm going to remove that threat from your family. Duram will find me a teacher who will keep me firmer in line after he punishes me."

 

He was still shaking, but Leon's shock was now of a different sort.  He'd never seen anything like that before, the way her skin was marked.  Well, sort of, he'd seen a couple of lines like that on his dad's chest, but that was just insanity.  Lashes, burns, why was Mina marked like that?  It just made everything more confusing because now different feelings welled up inside of him along with the fear that made everything worse.  But there was a question that came to him that he managed to say without a stutter.  "Why did you get h-hurt?"  Almost.

 

Mina frowned at Leon's question even as she finished her last buttons. It was good that he had snapped out of the worst fear but she didn't want him to feel sorry for her after what she had done to him. She turned to face him again and regarded him solemnly. He was a beautiful youngster and when he grew up a bit, he would likely fill up to the size of his father. He would grow up happy and normal and she would ensure that by leaving his family alone. She had had her week of guilty bliss and now it was time to pay the bill.

 

"The man who raised me did that. He was a crazy sadistic bastard and it seems that I am on my way of becoming such too. But we are not going to speak of me now but you. Are you alright, Leon? I was worried that you would get hurt since you just fought me so. And why didnd't you tell your mother about this in the first place? That was really stupid, running into woods with injuries like that."

 

Sitting up, Leon tucked his legs in and hugged them to himself as he looked at Mina, asking him about why he had done what he'd done.  He hadn't been entirely sure at the time, he just had.  His voice was a little steadier at least.  He wasn't sure if she wasn't going to hurt him, but she hadn't done anything yet.  Then again, there'd been no warning beforehand.  "I thought you were after me, just me.  So I asked Dad to take me camping, and he did.  I thought you hated me because, I don't know.  Felt strange around you..." Looking away, Leon asked.  "Why did he do that?"

 

His confession hurt and she just shook her head vigorously in protest but without words, letting him to finish. She ignored his question about Pander for a moment and thought of the best way to convince him that it was safe for him to return home with her. "I don't hate you, Leon", she told him intently. "I like you very very much and the same for your whole family. That's why I need to leave, don't you see? I'm not safe to be around with on a long run. I am badly messed up and it seems like I can explode just like that. Just like he did, without any other reason except that I was there and I was my mother's daughter. He wanted to marry her once."

 

Shaking her head impatiently, she got back to the really important topic. "You must have been pretty alright then if your father let you come here. I know he wouldn't have otherwise and he would have done something if he had known." She looked at him hard. "And what kind of a thinking was that, leaving your family with me and running into the woods? You should have told them right away and let them know what I am like."

 

Shrinking in on himself, Leon wasn't quick to reply.  "I don't know...  Everyone has been laughing at me, about you and I don't know.  Ever since you've been here I've been different, I don't know why but I just was.  You were fine with everyone else.  I thought I did something, and mum likes you, and dad, and the others.  I just wanted to get away, because you were going to come back to the house and find me.  You weren't going to do anything to them, just me.  I just wanted to get away.  I don't know why I didn't say anything, just didn't."

 

Looking down at his hands, he didn't know why his fear was fading, and now confusion and other things were coming back.  Maybe she wasn't going to hurt him again, she'd just snapped.  Thought that he was the other man.  It made sense, even though part of him didn't want it to.  If she didn't hate him, then it was an accident like she said. "What are you going to do now?"

 

Mina blinked at Leon in confusion. She hadn't noticed anyone laughing at him, why on earth would they? And even stranger, he claimed he had been behaving differently. That would explain the prank warnings that never came true. It made her uncomfortable for some reason so she decided to not pry into it any further. He could speak with Nyssa about it, she was good with that kind of things. "I... I am kind of happy that you didn't tell them yet. I got to... ah, nothing. But we have to tell them at some point. And that's what I was planning next. Take you home, tell them and then I will go with Duram."

 

"You can't stay here forever anyway and you can return now safely since I am leaving. We can even go different ways if you want to."

 

Leon looked up at Mina, frowning as he tried to make sense of it all.  After a couple of minutes he slowly stood and cautiously made his way over to her.  She seemed to understand and the pair began to walk towards home, though Leon was confused.  All the time, she'd been saying she didn't mean it, yet she was leaving because she didn't want to hurt anyone.  If she didn't mean to do it, but she was going to do it again, it didn't make any sense.  After a few minutes, Leon just stopped walking, forcing Mina to look at him.  "You didn't mean to do it, but you would do it again, why?"

 

Relief filled her when Leon stood up and walked to her like a frightened doe. She was careful to not make anything that might scare him away so for a moment they just trekked the woods homeward. Then Leon suddenly and she turned to look at him apprehensively. Had he changed his mind about returning with her? "Because I didn't mean to do it this time either but I couldn't control it. I don't want it to ever happen again. I just can't be sure of myself so I don't want to be around anyone who I could hurt."

 

She shrugged trying to cover that the thought of leaving was devastating to her. "Lets just walk on now. You don't have to pretend that you aren't glad to see me go."

 

Walking along with Mina again, Leon processed what had been said.  She didn't mean to do it, but she hadn't been able to control it.  She didn't want to do it again, she just couldn't be sure.  She thought that he was glad to see her go.  He wasn't sure about any of it and it wasn't long before a new question came to mind that caused him to slow his pace until he came to a halt again.  It seemed important for some reason, Uncle Duram had brought her to their home after all.  Uncle Duram always had a reason for what he did and he always ended up right.  "Why can't you control it?"

 

More questions. She didn't want to think right then but she couldn't help feeling. She was the incarnation of doom and gloom inside, dreading the confession. Nyssa and Michael would loose any affection that they might have held for her and she would never see them again. She had let herself to dream of good things, to settle down but that wasn't for her.

 

"I don't know", she confessed miserably. "It has never happened before but I haven't been away from it for that long. Who knows if it gets more frequent or even worse or... I haven't had any problems with your family this week, it was the intensity and fear when we sparred that did it. But it's going to happen again when your father starts training me, I know it", she cried. "I don't want that, I don't want anyone to see me like that. I don't want to be like that. And I could just snap."

 

Leon was quiet as he watched Mina, a few thoughts circling through his head as it became clearer now.  She'd been afraid of him!  Like he'd been of her except where he'd run away, she'd just lashed out.  Tried to beat what it was that made her afraid like how he'd struggled against her.  So if she'd been afraid when she'd lashed out, because of her scars and what the man had done to her before, then to not make her lose control was to make sure she didn't get afraid again.  "I'm not going home."

 

Mina & Leon

Mina's eyes narrowed to small slits and she glared at Leon. What had gotten into him now? She could tell to him that yes he would and remind him that she was bigger and meaner than him but that would have defeated everything she had achieved so far. Patience grated on her but she managed it. "And why not? You have to." Maybe the guilt trick would do it. "Your mother is worried about you."

 

"No." Leon knew a guilt trip when he heard one, and he'd made his decision now.  Uncle Duram had a reason for all of this, he knew everyone and he knew what Mina was like.  Now Leon thought he understood a bit of what Mina had felt, and it wasn't right.  He didn't want her to leave.  "If I return, you'll leave.  If I don't return, you can't leave.  Unless you decide to stay, I'm not going back.  You didn't mean to do it, Uncle Duram knew what he was doing when he brought you here, he always does."

 

"What?", she burst out angrily and then moderated her tone which came off a bit too much like she was talking to a child or a simpleton but she was working very hard to restrain herself. "That is very kind of you, Leon, but you have no idea what it is like. You don't have that kind of a darkness and rage bubbling inside you waiting to just lash out and hurt others. You want me to stay around your family and just wait when it happens again? Who is it going to be next, Gabriel? Little Toulan when she bla..."  ....blackmails me the next time, she mentally finished the sentence she had bit off. "...blathers my head off", she added lamely when she could not think anything else.

 

"I don't care."  She wouldn't hit him again, she wasn't afraid so she wouldn't  It was a mantra in Leon's mind that helped keep himself firm as he overrode Mina's attempt to talk with a surprising amount of strength for a boy who was beginning to shake like a leaf from the strain.  "You only do it if you're afraid, so stop being afraid!  Everyone likes you here, Uncle Duram put you here for a reason.  I'm not letting you leave, and if you make me go home I'll run away and burn you if you think I won't.  You aren't telling mum or dad or anyone, as long as they don't know then you can stay.  I won't tell if you won't."

 

She stared at the brat in frustration. Why did he have to be so difficult? He just didn't get it. And there he went again, being so afraid of her that he trembled. She held out a hand to him but let it drop. "Easy for you to say to stop being afraid", she cried. "You've never really been afraid in your life except maybe of me. You know what has been the worse thing this week? How nice everyone have been to me and knowing that it all would change if I told them what I did to you. It's all based on a lie, an omission of my true nature. It's not going to last so better end it before it gets any more painful for any of us. I have to come clean or I can't stay and if I do, then they won't let me to stay either."

 

"You didn't mean to do it." There it was, a single stubborn point that Leon had latched onto.  "If you didn't mean to then thats not you.  Just means that the man who hurt you has you scared.  Just like you had me scared, but I'm not running now am I?  Yours is worse, but doesn't mean you can't change either.  And I'm not going back, so unless you want to carry me all the way back then too bad!"

 

Leon kept repeating the same thing and it was so appealing to believe him. And it was true that she was scared and it annoyed her. She wanted to be free of Pander Wilkes in body and soul and that he still had some hold on her, had left a legacy was wrong. She hadn't lashed this week, hadn't even had a remote thought like it. She could maybe control herself and if she just wiggled out of the blade lessons, then it might work out. Nyssa couldn't fight much in the traditional way either. She wanted to since she couldn't defend herself well enough with the One Power but she had channeled today without being angry.

 

His threat earned him an annoyed and sour look. He really was not going to give her the relief of getting the guilt off her chest. If she lied to him and got him to the house and confessed, he might be stupid enough to really run off. Maybe just maybe she wasn't meant to tell anyone and it would be her punishment to live with it. And Toulan knew now too, maybe she would tell. Only Mina didn't want her to and that was why she had complied to her demands in the first place. Maybe she was part of it too. It was so very logical, a relieving realization.

 

Leon might have forgiven her a bit and want her back in the house. She wanted to go back too and never leave but she could not cast aside the blame and fear of doing it again. But exactly that would keep her from it. She would be careful, so very careful. "Why are you so very insistent of having me back in the house?", she asked warily but he could hear that she was half budged. "After what I just did to you, I wouldn't want to have anything to do with me."

 

"Because you didn't meant to do it!"  Walking toward Mina, with only a few feet he tripped forward and was luckily caught by Mina as he landed on his knees.  So tired.  "Not going."  It might have been the fact that he felt sorry for her, a bit ashamed that he'd scared her, that he'd never had a playmate around his age who wasn't family, the fact Uncle Duram wanted her there, madness or a combination of the above or perhaps other reasons.  He did not want her to go, it was that simple and he'd be damned if he let her.  Wrapping his arms around one of her legs in a fairly childish gesture, he was blunt.  "Not letting go until you say you'll stay."

 

The kid was staggering, she realised with a fresh flood of guilt. He had really given his everything in struggling her. When he hugged her legs, she could only laugh helplessly. She had almost made her mind anyway and it was disarming and touching that he wanted her to stay after everything. "Alright, I am staying." She knelt beside him and ruffled his hair. "You did fight really well earlier today, you know? I'd say that we are even now. But lets not do that again." She shivered. "I might maybe learn from your father but I don't ever want to ever experience anything like that again."

 

Standing she grabbed his wrists and hoisted him up. Since his knees seemed a bit wobbly, she made no number about it but wrapped her arm around his waist companionably. "Lets get going then or we'll miss all the dessert. Oh and what is that all I have heard about you being a real prankster? Your reputation has been greatly exaggerated."

 

It got a laugh out of him and he shared some of his best stories which in turn made her chuckle and the long walk home was spent chatting amiably.

 

Mina & Leon