Granted. it's skynet.

 

I wish I didn't need to sleep.

Granted, but you still dream... I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S REAL *runs screaming into a bus*

 

I wish I had telekinesis.

Granted. But the only thing it affects is peas.

 

I wish I could speak 10 langauges.

Granted, but you won't be able to hear the difference between any of those 10 languages while you are talking to someone.

 

I wish I could sail around the world on a ship.

Fine, but you can't disembark, and all they serve is authentic hard-tack, maggots included.

 

I wish life had a reset button.

Granted, but you will reset the life of everyone else too when you press the button. 

 

I wish I didn't stay so long awake for no reason.

Granted. You stay awake too long for bad reasons...

 

I wish I could Travel.

You can, but all your Gateways open to a Tijuana slum behind the stall of a donkey named Slim Jim...

 

I wish for infinite wishes!!

granted. The Genie is hard of hearing. He thinks you said infinite Fishes. He was also very bitter so sends you to the Shark tank at Sea World. For some reason no one has fed them in a week.

 

I wish I could Travel to where I want to go... (and just Ewwwwww)

FIne, you can travel where YOU want to go, but Slim Jim HAS to come. He's like your Gateway ter'angreal.

Also, he's cock-eyed.

 

 

I wish I jump inside books and be in parallel dimensions.

Turin and Slim Jim... BFF

Also, just WHAT is Ithi doing?!

 

Excellent. I can deal with that. Ithi is getting you your "special sauce" for you fish & chips

 

Granted. your keep getting the honor of being unnamed red shirt #2 in all your Star Trek books 

 

I wish that Tsuki didn't have to die for his wishes

Granted.

 

Buries Tsuki alive.

 

I wish I didn't have to get up so early in the morning.

Weeee I love this game!

 

Granted. Now you cant sleep at all.

 

I wish I could stay in the States longer.

Welcome to Leavenworth.

 

Also, I don't have any star trek books (or star wars, or any other "franchise" sci-fi... I'm a snob - Heinlein, Asimov, McCaffrey...)

 

I wish Turin's breath didn't smell like he subsists on a diet of Slim Jim's "special sauce"...

Granted. Now yours does.

 

I wish I had sufficient space for all my books.

Granted. In a galaxy far far away there now exists a very large bookshelf that says 'property of Turin'.

 

I wish scorpions ceased to exist.

Granted, but now spiders are the size of Slim Jim.

 

I wish I had finished my book.

granted. as you finish the last page you forget what happened at the beginning, so now the end makes no sense.

 

I wish I was on the beach

two words... sand fleas.

one word... underpants

 

 

I wish I had a pilot's license

Granted ...

 

Two days later you are arrested for pickpocketing and made to give it back.

 

 

I wish that I were braver.

Granted... But now you are bored unless jumping out of an airplane and having to catch your parachute on the way down.

 

I wish I was better at wishing

Granted... But now you are bored unless jumping out of an airplane and having to catch your parachute on the way down.

 

I wish I was better at wishing

 

You just threw me out of an airplane without a parachute?! What were you thinking?

 

*falls*

 

Also granted ... Wishes that I have a parachute on your behalf and grants it instantly, leaving you with no wish of your own.

 

 

 

I wish that something nice would happen.

Wish granted. I get a new gaming computer. Thanks Ithi! ;D

 

I wish I could breathe under water asl well as normally