It was three days since they'd left the farmstead, Con realised. Three whole days. The morning after they'd arrived, Arette had given them the directions they'd required to follow the trail left by the darkfriends. Claiming that the villagers had followed them as far as they could before returning to give Arette, or rather, Lini, the news, it had proven far superior to the alternative of saying that Arette had been informed by Tower Guards and even her own warder Calvin.

 

Speaking of Arette, the last few days had been... difficult. She had trouble being Lini, humble didn't come to her so easily with Children of the Light. Well, except when Brandeis was about, then again the man had that effect on people who didn't know him. Even the other Children were still a little leery of Brandeis, but that was because he often used his position to intimidate his way into things, like the last cup of wine or not collecting firewood. Once they realised he wasn't about to strap them on a table and take to them with assorted sharp implements they'd be fine.

 

But his thoughts were wandering off the points, Arette. He was glad he had spoken to her as little as possible, and with the Children about she preferred to keep to herself. Which suited him perfectly well. Of course, it did present a few problems. He had so many questions about Rana and Cina, yet he could ask none of them because the only person who did know was Arette. Talking to her meant... Ugh, it was not something Con wished to entertain for long.

 

Still, they needed firewood amongst other things. They'd made their way into a wooded area, so there wasn't nearly as great an issue of having a fire for the entire night. On the plans it was a problem because it was a beacon for miles, but with woods for cover it would certainly be a warmer night.

 

Having seen Brandeis sitting about, Con decided it was time for Brandeis to help do some work. Brandeis didn't look entirely pleased about it, but that probably had to do with Luca cracking a joke about the inquisitor getting his hands dirty. As the pair made their way, meandering about as they picked up various sticks that had fallen, Con found himself remembering that he owed Brandeis an explanation to it all.

 

Indeed, Con was lucky that Brandeis had not pushed the issue sooner. Instead, the man had trusted him to come forward when he was ready, Brandeis was rare in that trait. Especialy amongst the Hand, but then again, he wasn't like the other Inquisitors.

 

It wasn't long until Con found an ideal place. Gesturing for Brandeis to take a seat on a stump, Con pulled up his own chair so to speak witha fallen log. Waiting for Brandeis to make himself comfortable, Con kept his peace until Brandeis was settled.

 

"I do be owing you a few answers. Where do you be wanting me to start?"

 

 

Con Stavros

Child of the Light

It was three days since they'd left the farmstead, Con realised. Three whole days. The morning after they'd arrived, Arette had given them the directions they'd required to follow the trail left by the darkfriends. Claiming that the villagers had followed them as far as they could before returning to give Arette, or rather, Lini, the news, it had proven far superior to the alternative of saying that Arette had been informed by Tower Guards and even her own warder Calvin.

 

Speaking of Arette, the last few days had been... difficult. She had trouble being Lini, humble didn't come to her so easily with Children of the Light. Well, except when Brandeis was about, then again the man had that effect on people who didn't know him. Even the other Children were still a little leery of Brandeis, but that was because he often used his position to intimidate his way into things, like the last cup of wine or not collecting firewood. Once they realised he wasn't about to strap them on a table and take to them with assorted sharp implements they'd be fine.

 

But his thoughts were wandering off the points, Arette. He was glad he had spoken to her as little as possible, and with the Children about she preferred to keep to herself. Which suited him perfectly well. Of course, it did present a few problems. He had so many questions about Rana and Cina, yet he could ask none of them because the only person who did know was Arette. Talking to her meant... Ugh, it was not something Con wished to entertain for long.

 

Still, they needed firewood amongst other things. They'd made their way into a wooded area, so there wasn't nearly as great an issue of having a fire for the entire night. On the plans it was a problem because it was a beacon for miles, but with woods for cover it would certainly be a warmer night.

 

Having seen Brandeis sitting about, Con decided it was time for Brandeis to help do some work. Brandeis didn't look entirely pleased about it, but that probably had to do with Luca cracking a joke about the inquisitor getting his hands dirty. As the pair made their way, meandering about as they picked up various sticks that had fallen, Con found himself remembering that he owed Brandeis an explanation to it all.

 

Indeed, Con was lucky that Brandeis had not pushed the issue sooner. Instead, the man had trusted him to come forward when he was ready, Brandeis was rare in that trait. Especialy amongst the Hand, but then again, he wasn't like the other Inquisitors.

 

It wasn't long until Con found an ideal place. Gesturing for Brandeis to take a seat on a stump, Con pulled up his own chair so to speak witha fallen log. Waiting for Brandeis to make himself comfortable, Con kept his peace until Brandeis was settled.

 

"I do be owing you a few answers. Where do you be wanting me to start?"

 

 

Con Stavros

Child of the Light

He had no real aversion to doing his share. His hands were stained with countless hours imbedded in soils. Often he carried with him the rich loamy scent of peat, mixed with a salmagundi of herbs, spices and flowers. Brandeis only liked to test the water to push the boundaries; see how far his laurels as an Inquisitor might take him. His station proved useful in minimizing cost and also having fun and the expense of another. Two things he was quick to take advantage of.

 

Brandeis followed Con from the campsite to forage; rolled up his sleeves while his bone-white uniform was quick to become bespattered with grime and dirt. A more devout Inquisitor may have removed the emblem bearing tabard, not Brandeis Meinrad. There were times for acting the foppish dandy and other times when it was forced into the back of the carriage by necessary labour. Also, Brandeis liked to irritate his superiors.

 

Brandeis acted only mild surprise when Con gestured for him to have a seat, on a stump of all things. He shifted his position; remained silent, waiting for his companion to begin. When he felt certain that Con was on the verge of preamble, he shifted his position again: then again. Repeating this process several times he was quick to realise that Con was paying more attention to the order of his own thoughts than the external actions of Brandeis. The conversation would be important and he knew on instinct what course the discussion would take.

 

"I do be owing you a few answers. Where do you be wanting me to start?"

 

Brandeis held up his hand to forestall any further comments. Reaching down to his belt he withdrew a sizeable flask. He held it up in front of his companion, an eyebrow half rising in query. To take some awkward gravity from the situation he replied with in a light tone:

 

“We start here. I picked it up from a… supplier I once brought in for questioning. Terrible stuff and over-priced but it’ll put a fire in yer belly and take the edge off any situation. From there?—Well, that’s up to you.â€

 

Tossing the flask to Con, Brandeis tried to keep the excitement from his posture as he waited for the man to begin.

He had no real aversion to doing his share. His hands were stained with countless hours imbedded in soils. Often he carried with him the rich loamy scent of peat, mixed with a salmagundi of herbs, spices and flowers. Brandeis only liked to test the water to push the boundaries; see how far his laurels as an Inquisitor might take him. His station proved useful in minimizing cost and also having fun and the expense of another. Two things he was quick to take advantage of.

 

Brandeis followed Con from the campsite to forage; rolled up his sleeves while his bone-white uniform was quick to become bespattered with grime and dirt. A more devout Inquisitor may have removed the emblem bearing tabard, not Brandeis Meinrad. There were times for acting the foppish dandy and other times when it was forced into the back of the carriage by necessary labour. Also, Brandeis liked to irritate his superiors.

 

Brandeis acted only mild surprise when Con gestured for him to have a seat, on a stump of all things. He shifted his position; remained silent, waiting for his companion to begin. When he felt certain that Con was on the verge of preamble, he shifted his position again: then again. Repeating this process several times he was quick to realise that Con was paying more attention to the order of his own thoughts than the external actions of Brandeis. The conversation would be important and he knew on instinct what course the discussion would take.

 

"I do be owing you a few answers. Where do you be wanting me to start?"

 

Brandeis held up his hand to forestall any further comments. Reaching down to his belt he withdrew a sizeable flask. He held it up in front of his companion, an eyebrow half rising in query. To take some awkward gravity from the situation he replied with in a light tone:

 

“We start here. I picked it up from a… supplier I once brought in for questioning. Terrible stuff and over-priced but it’ll put a fire in yer belly and take the edge off any situation. From there?—Well, that’s up to you.â€

 

Tossing the flask to Con, Brandeis tried to keep the excitement from his posture as he waited for the man to begin.

Catching the flask and uncorking it, Con couldn't say he was overly surprised. Brandeis had been developing a certain fondness for drink, Con would have too if he'd had to do what Brandeis had to sometimes. Taking a sizeable swig, he winced slightly as he forced it down before stoppering the flask and tossing it back to Brandeis who proceeded to have a swig in turn. "Just one thing I be asking, alot of things I do be going to tell you, they do be going to be... difficult for you to be hearing, let alone me to be saying. You'll be staying here till we be done talking?"

 

Braxton paused. That was an interesting question for Con to ask. A question that added much fuel to the fire of his growing curiousity. This was big news, big. The Inquisitor in him had to know. Needed to know. He craved the secrets and forbidden knowledge. A life time of nurtured and groomed thirst filled his head until his vision became clouded. With an effort of will the cloud receded; Brandeis sighed with relief. Finding his voice he almost whispered, "agreed."

 

Con nodded before speaking. "There no be a way to be couching it but... Lini be Arette Nenatiar, the old Keeper of Chronicles before the previous Amyrlin be overthrown in the White Tower. She do be helping us locate the twins of an Aes Sedai that do be kidnapped by Darkfriends, one who be like a sister to me, Telcia Dyfelle-Alianin. The two babies that Arette do be caring for were her own and... mine." There, he'd said it.

 

Brandeis froze. His body suspeneded in space as his mind reeled. His fingers turned white; as the first signs of his outrage began to show. White hot anger flashed through his body. His eyes narrowed and darkened. His jaw clamped shut and a vein in the side of his head began to throb. Brandeis had never allowed his anger to play so easily upon his features but all his willpower could do nothing to stem the tide.

 

Just as quickly as it came, the fit passed. His inner turmoil lessened as he made his decision. He would trust in his friend, though it may cost him not only his head, but the heads of those whitecloaks who had followed the ex-warder on this quest. Working his mouth silently for a time, Brandeis looked hard at Con Stavros, his next words noticeably difficult.

 

"You know as well as I the penalties if we are discovered. I will follow you in this, though it may imperil us all. I am too far in this to back out now. Even if I wanted to. I have had misgivings over the predetermined guilt of the witches. I will repay your trust in kind. I will not betray you for doing what you believe is right. I pray they are worth your life, Con."

 

Hearing those words was like having a great weight lift from Con's shoulders. "Thank you Brandeis, it do be meaning alot to me to be knowing that you be trusting me so. I do be hoping that we no be hung for this either, but I do be having little choice. As to congratulations... It no be as easy as that, it..."

 

Shaking his head, Con gestured for the bottle and took a much greater swig than before, it'd be a bit easier that way. Handing the bottle back, Con was blunt. "You ever be having a great love in your life? One woman that you be wanting to give yourself to, that one only?"

 

 

Con Stavros

Child of the Light

Catching the flask and uncorking it, Con couldn't say he was overly surprised. Brandeis had been developing a certain fondness for drink, Con would have too if he'd had to do what Brandeis had to sometimes. Taking a sizeable swig, he winced slightly as he forced it down before stoppering the flask and tossing it back to Brandeis who proceeded to have a swig in turn. "Just one thing I be asking, alot of things I do be going to tell you, they do be going to be... difficult for you to be hearing, let alone me to be saying. You'll be staying here till we be done talking?"

 

Braxton paused. That was an interesting question for Con to ask. A question that added much fuel to the fire of his growing curiousity. This was big news, big. The Inquisitor in him had to know. Needed to know. He craved the secrets and forbidden knowledge. A life time of nurtured and groomed thirst filled his head until his vision became clouded. With an effort of will the cloud receded; Brandeis sighed with relief. Finding his voice he almost whispered, "agreed."

 

Con nodded before speaking. "There no be a way to be couching it but... Lini be Arette Nenatiar, the old Keeper of Chronicles before the previous Amyrlin be overthrown in the White Tower. She do be helping us locate the twins of an Aes Sedai that do be kidnapped by Darkfriends, one who be like a sister to me, Telcia Dyfelle-Alianin. The two babies that Arette do be caring for were her own and... mine." There, he'd said it.

 

Brandeis froze. His body suspeneded in space as his mind reeled. His fingers turned white; as the first signs of his outrage began to show. White hot anger flashed through his body. His eyes narrowed and darkened. His jaw clamped shut and a vein in the side of his head began to throb. Brandeis had never allowed his anger to play so easily upon his features but all his willpower could do nothing to stem the tide.

 

Just as quickly as it came, the fit passed. His inner turmoil lessened as he made his decision. He would trust in his friend, though it may cost him not only his head, but the heads of those whitecloaks who had followed the ex-warder on this quest. Working his mouth silently for a time, Brandeis looked hard at Con Stavros, his next words noticeably difficult.

 

"You know as well as I the penalties if we are discovered. I will follow you in this, though it may imperil us all. I am too far in this to back out now. Even if I wanted to. I have had misgivings over the predetermined guilt of the witches. I will repay your trust in kind. I will not betray you for doing what you believe is right. I pray they are worth your life, Con."

 

Hearing those words was like having a great weight lift from Con's shoulders. "Thank you Brandeis, it do be meaning alot to me to be knowing that you be trusting me so. I do be hoping that we no be hung for this either, but I do be having little choice. As to congratulations... It no be as easy as that, it..."

 

Shaking his head, Con gestured for the bottle and took a much greater swig than before, it'd be a bit easier that way. Handing the bottle back, Con was blunt. "You ever be having a great love in your life? One woman that you be wanting to give yourself to, that one only?"

 

 

Con Stavros

Child of the Light

But it’s too late to say you’re sorry

How would I know?

Why should I care?

Please don’t bother trying to find her

She’s not there

 

- Malcolm McLaren: About Her

 

 

The Traitor's Court.... all the Aes Sedai were gathered there.... looking at her with those unreadable faces but their eyes were full of pure dislike and contempt for her. They had come to pass a judgement on her... No one spoke for her, not even her Brown sisters and her Defender. Telcia was silent too, averting her face.... Slowly but surely they all turned their thumbs down... Guilty, a traitor, a despised one. They made her kneel hard on the tiles. The Reds were preparing the weave that would separate her forever from life itself, Saidar... And suddenly if wasn't her anymore, but she was watching the Stilling settling on another woman, whose face she knew like her own. Karana. NOOOO!!!!

 

She woke with a sob, sweaty and tangled into her sheets. It was her fault that her mentor, her Mother had been there. The Aes Sedai were widely feared and even hated by some. And the majority of the Aes Sedai had shared the last feeling themselves when it came for her. The Hall had made their fateful decision after Karana had decided to not give her up. It was a power play of course, but she had been the bait. The Greens had been behind it. The Greens and Reds, slighted at her machinations against them. But it wasn't irreversible. Raina had a way to Heal Karana. All she had to do was find her and bring her to Raina. She owed it to Karana: she should have been there beside her that day, kneeling on the tiles. But the babies had saved her. And now they loved her unquestioningly, propably the first people ever to do that. The Hall might not have known that their decree would be a punishment. Exile from the Tower hurt of course, but this was even more cruel. She didn't deserve their love. Not anyone's love. How could she have ever thought that Con could forgive her and they could be just the way they had been? There was no way for them. Con didn't know her, not truly. He had seen mere peaks to what she really was and recoiled.

 

The darkness of the tent pressed on her. She had to get out. She ripped the sheets in her anxiousness to leave their strangling embrace, but had enough sense left to grab her dark cloak. She didn't want the white of the nightgown reveal her to the Whitecloaks outside. Someone might actually offer to escort her and she wanted to be alone. As she fastened her cloak, she could feel the wetness on her chest, flowing toward her belly. It was milk and its sweet scent reminded her again of the girls. She didn't have words for her agony of being apart of them, the flesh of her flesh. She stumbled onward blinded by tears, but the saddle soreness kept her pacing so slow that she didn't make much sound. She didn't know how long she had been wandering around, lost in her pain before she was alerted by voices. She halted her steps and hid behind a tree.

 

It was Con speaking with one of the men, whom she recognised as the inquisitor. She was about to turn away, when she heard her own real name mentioned. Her heart stopped for a moment with terror. Now he had done it! Light, it would be useless to run in her condition. And if she tried to harm any of the Cloaks, it would just confirm her guiltiness. It took Brandeis a while to reply and Arette had time to develop and abandon many desperate escape plans. His response astonished her... he wasn't going to turn her in until their mission was completed. And he was having doubts about the inherent evilness of the Aes Sedai. A VERY rare Inquisitor indeed. She wondered if the men with them knew about his blasphemous views. They had to know or Con wouldn't have taken them along.

 

Oh, but then Con was moving on a truly interesting topic... love. It wasn't honorable to eavesdrop, but if Con wasn't talking to her, how else was she to find out what he thought of her and their chances. She knew that she might not hear things she wanted to - the last time when she had spied on him and Telcia had been the last straw to break their already wobbly relationship - but even wild horses couldn't have made her leave now. She tried to make herself as comfortable as possible and prayed that there would be even slight hope for them in his words.

 

Arette Nenatiar

Retired Brown Sister

Former Keeper of the Chronicles

Mother of Rana and Cina

Bonded to Calvin Gaidin

Brandeis shrugged. There had been attractions—for certain but nothing substantial. It was difficult to pursue a meaningful relationship when one earned both coin and admiration by the screams and whimpers of those interrogated by ones own hand. He had found from experience; the only women seeking him were of the Children. Blood-thirsty fanatics, wishing only to court the blunt instrument of misery and suffering wielded against friends of the dark. Hardpan refusal to speak of his experiences won him little in the way of affection.

 

“No.†He replied in subdued tone. “Asking anyone to overlook the obvious details of my… occupation would be hard at best.â€

 

Nodding, Con paused as he considered his words. "Arette do be that one love. It all be beginning with an argument too, shaky beginning but... It be difficult. I do be but a Tower Guard of no distinction then, and she be the Keeper of Chronicles. She be fearing the other sisters whispers, so we be keeping it secret, as best it could be. I be doing it for her, but what kind of hope do such a thing be happening? Yet things be changing."

 

"Trollocs be coming from the Jangai Pass, chased out by the Aiel presumably. They be travelling west towards Tar Valon, and we be meeting them in a battle. If not for the Aes Sedai and their healing I would be dead, as it was I be asleep for a week and when I do be waking from it I be finding Arette by my side. She be coming into the open about it. The Commander of the Guard, Evan Tremaine, he be falling during the battle and I be given his post. There be mutterings I be getting because I be the Keeper's lover, but I be doing my duty. Yet between our duties there be little time for both of us, though we be doing what we can to make the time."

 

Sighing, Con slumped forward slightly as memories came to him of what followed. "But politics be interfering amongst other things, as well as one of my students be falling for one of hers. She... So many things be coming between us. Then of course, the grand moment. Telcia who I do be mentioning earlier, she be pregnant and be wishing to be giving birth away from the White Tower, so as to be giving her children a chance to grow up normally. She be needing someone to be taking her that she be trusting, so I be agreeing to. She be giving birth in Caemlyn to twins, but we be continuing on to Cairhien where she be having time to them. When I be returning..."

 

Con's eyes narrowed in the memory of it, but more from pain than anything else. "I be going to Arette and after... a moment, she be telling me that she be knowing about me and Telcia, thinking we be betraying her, and be telling me it be mattering little as I never be anothing more to her than... an amusement."

 

Brandeis listened quietly as the tale unfolded. His Inquisitor mind ran previous actions against this new information. Many pieces of the puzzle began to fall into place. The suspicion that he meant more to the woman than she led him to believe was puissant but without “questioning†her it was impossible to say for certain. Nor was it his place to offer such hopes. The sympathy for his friend was genuine and he reached a hand out in a reassuring gesture. He hesitated and withdrew his hand before completing the action. His opinion of Con Stavros had rise. His opinion of Aes Sedai had not.

 

He was at a loss for what to say. What could he say? He could incapacitate the witch and torture her extensively… but neither Con nor his own conscience would approve of such an act. While having not sworn an oath, his word was his bond. In the end he did the only thing he could do, turning to Con he asked: “more drink?â€

 

"Thanks." Taking more than just a swig this time, Con was starting to feel it, which was a good thing because it was just going to get harder to talk at this point. "I no be saying anything, I just be walking out. What did there be to be said? No be saying I no struggle with it. Aes Sedai be sworn to be telling the truth, that oath be tied to them, even if they be finding ways about it. She be telling me before she be loving me, then later that she no be. For a long time... But after so long, it be something I think I be solving."

 

"She did be loving me, then because of what be constantly be coming between us... She be changing her mind, how she be remembering things, so she be believing that she never be loving me for true. It be more bitter than the love simply being a lie. I be giving her everything of me, yet she no be trusting me enough, no be giving me that faith back, and be sticking that dagger in because she be hurt because she be seeing something that no be true. My love no be good enough for her, so she be taking it and ripping it out of me and be yanking my guts out with it."

 

"And now I be finding out when we first be seeing her in the farmstead her children be by me."

 

Brandeis let out a loud, long whistle. There was nothing he could say or do to ease the pain of his friend. He swore a private oath, that if it were the last thing he did, he would drag the Aes Sedai witch over the coals—figuratively speaking. Of course—for her actions. He was hoping that Con Stavros would reveal some startling revelation. Some overlooked item on the list that could lead him to believe that the White Tower was more than he had ever believed. While still open to it, his hope was fading fast. Perhaps he was wrong to question the ways of his order after all. “We're going to need more drink.†He added vocally.

Bliss filled Arette when she heard the words of love confession from Con's mouth. It had been so long from the last time. And he hadn't used past tense. The uplifting emotion nearly carried her through Con's recital of her stupidity and knowing that Brandeis heard it too. Light, what the man must be thinking of her. And of all Aes Sedai. She wondered if he had actually met one before... and if he had tortured a Sister. But she was trying to just distract herself from listening to Con's unpleasent retelling of the events. So she stopped and let the old shame and regret fill her. She had really hurt him on purpose, known how what she would imply would crush him.

 

Was he really right and had she not really loved him? If she had, how could she have done something like to him? Or was she just so insecure and sad person that she couldn't have let herself be loved? A jealous person was not feeling herself secure, could Con not see that? It wasn't merely him she hadn't trusted, she didn't trust herself either. When it came to personal life, she was clumsy and unconfident as a toddler. Emotions had always been a difficult thing to her, something to fear and to suppress. And she had never during her long and useless life felt anything like with Con. It had been a rough ride, and largely because she had been pulling the reigns all the time to keep the pace slower. She hadn't wanted to fall and hurt herself. Not anymore. She had to be the one, who others relied on, not the other way around. Con had become too important to her and so she had sabotaged their chances by refusing to believe that he could feel the same about her. After all, there had been Telcia and who man wouldn't choose Telcia over her. And who woman wouldn't choose Con over that irresponsible scoundrel Iussi.

 

If she really wanted him back, she would have to stake her heart. Hiding in her tent when they had camped and avoiding him wouldn't do the trick. He would have to see her around and think about her, no matter he wouldn't like it at first. He would get used to her presence in his life as long as it would take and maybe one day want her closer. That she wouldn't rush, but... she felt a pang of guilt when she thought of using the girls as the bait. Still, they were her best key for reconciliation on long term as unintentional as their birth had been. Light, a miracle rather for a woman of her age. But they weren't here now and even if they were, she would not risk their wellbeing for Con. They deserved a father, who could at least be in the same room than their mother. How long it would take was another question then. But the seeds would be sowed on this trip, because he couldn't run too far away from her.

 

Her thoughts were paused by the silence from the clearing. The quiet moment was broken by Brandeis' whistle and call for more drinks. Arette shook her head. It was such a man thing to need to dose themselves with spirits to be able to talk. But then, she was also greatful. Otherwise she might have not found out in weeks or even months what he was feeling. And maybe even what he was going to do.

 

Arette Nenatiar

Retired Brown Sister

Nodding at Brandeis, Con waited for the man to pass him the drink and proceeded to help himself to some more before passing it back once again. There was something to be said for the drink when it came to loosening the tongue. He wasn't sure if he would have had the will to speak of all that had transpired otherwise. While most presumed him to be made of stone, or iron, the truth of the matter was that some things were too painful for anyone to deal with easily, and he was no different in that respect.

 

"I only be wishing Telcia be with us. It be her children that we be trying to find, Jamal and Jelene. It be so long since I be seeing her. When I be saying she be a kinswoman, there be no lie to it in that she truly be as a sister. I know I be able to trust her, and be knowing that it never be repaid in treachery. There be such a difference between the two."

 

Brandeis let out an almost inaudible sigh: "Tell me more of this Telcia." What Brandeis did not add was his own sudden inclination to go and open the Aes Sedai--Arette’s--throat. Just as the inquisitor was to abandon all hope the ex Tower Guard strung him along with yet more possibility. Brandeis was desperate to find some redeeming quality in the Aes Sedai, not for their sake, but for his own. He could betray his brethren, the light, and his very life for a cause he believed in... he was unsure how far his oath would sustain him if he did not. If Telcia had earned Con’s trust perhaps she would vindicate the order in his eyes.

 

Arette could not. As far as Brandeis was concerned she was little, other than dangerous and excess baggage. As the mother of Con’s children he would not be able to dispose of her outright. He had promised Con he would aid him in retrieving the lost: Arette’s life was not part of the bargain. Ah... but could he in good conscience destroy the woman--even if she were a witch--who commanded his friend’s heart with such strength...? No. Every child needed a mother... even a mother such as her.

 

Con chuckled "for you to be understanding, I do be needing to explain the Tower. It is... Imagine you do be having the power to be commanding the wind, fire, waters and the earth itself, even things that do be invisible, these are the powers they be having. The price for that power do be its addiction. You be seeing dreamsellers and their wares before I no be doubting, be thinking that but the call of it be that much worse. If you be succumbing to it, you be losing the power altogether, lose part of your soul."

 

"To be learning to control it, they be locked away in study in the Tower for years. They be forced to obey strict rules, they no be knowing the world beyond the Tower. It usually be taking twenty years if not longer to be becoming Aes Sedai, and they be taken as young as 12 to be raised in the power there. By that time, they be disconnected from ordinary people."

 

"There be many reasons for them to be raising them isolated so. But the result be that by the time they be raised, they be trained to think differently to other people, and their loyalty always be to the Tower. In a different time, it be necessary perhaps to be ensuring that channelers weren't free to be fighting the battles of nations, but now... They be isolated from the concerns of the people, the all they be serving."

 

"This be further exacerbated that they be split seven ways. Let me be thinking of a way to be explaining it... Imagine that the Children do be split seven ways, each be led by a Lord Captain but for their safety, only those within their company do be knowing who the Lord Captain be. Between the seven groups, they be voting a Lord Captain Commander, but all great decisions be requiring the seven groups to be agreeing. Now be thinking that each of the different groups be having very different agendas or missions. The Tower be consumed with politics as a result because each group or Ajah be striving to have their agenda be given greater focus."

 

"In this environment... They no be evil, but they be little different from nobles of the lands that be feuding for influence within a court. No, that be a sweeping statement as well. Those sisters that often be holding power be like that, but many sisters do be simply given to their duties. Yellow sisters to the healing of the sick and wounded for example, a Brown sister that be doing research into the sciences, or even Red sisters that be risking their lives to be capturing male channelers before they do be causing a great deal of destruction."

 

"Amongst all of that be Telcia, who no be so consumed by the politics and be more concerned with helping people instead. Even if it be a bit condescending at first, when she be realising that be so she be changing. She be giving ordinary people the same weight as she be giving sisters, and she be one of the few sisters to ever be marrying, a Tower Guard no less despite tradition against it. I be going through alot with her, she be saving my life as I be saving hers."

 

Brandeis seemed to be taking it in, and Con continued. "Yet the Tower be like a nation itself; it be having its good people, it be having its bad, it be having many people in the middle that just be trying to get by and do their duty. Similar to the Children in that respect; oustanding few, outstanding bad, the rest that be trying to get by."

 

 

Con Stavros

Child of the Light

There was a nod and a release of bated breath. A breath Brandeis had not been aware he was stifling. There was hope, then. The Inquisitor would meet this Aes Sedai; would assess her worth through his own devices and if he found her the solution to his crisis, he would present his findings to the ruling factions within the Children. Perhaps his contention would be vetoed, quashed or silenced… but he could not—would not—subject “humans†to the brutal conduct of his order. Brandeis loathed harming even those “animals†assigned to his care.

 

Compassion and clemency toward the enemy carried with it a heavy penalty: suspicion, accusation and mistrust. Brandeis avoided his brother Inquisitors, preferring to spend his time with anyone—or while anywhere—else. Already the strain was showing. Were he to return with a new perspective, one not so clouded by history and legend, could he ever face his brothers and sisters again? Could he swallow their lusts and blind hatreds with calm forbearance? Perhaps… perhaps a measure of doubt was more satisfactory than clarity…

 

How can a tower, miles away, so dictate the course of our lives? To Con he added: “Are you going to parsh me that… or am I going to haff to… take it from you?†Snatching at the bottle he took several long draws and then sighed loudly. His speech had thickened; become slurred. Worries and stresses diminished, washing away with a tide of cool placidity. “There wash a time. A time when I was sure… about… the role I played against the shadow. I am no longer convished… of any think. Do you think I enjoy… torturing…? Welsh, I don’t. There are times in life… times when we all do things… for duty. I think that tree over there is trying to talk to us. What? Never mind. Where wash I …?

 

“Haff… haff you ever heard such screams? Man… or beast? That ish always the queshton. We “question,â€--which ish just a fancy way to say maim, cripple and beat—animals: servants off the shadow. We do not harm humans, only animals but how often are we wrong? Part of me wants your Aes Sedai to be innocent, part of me. Aes Sedai can scream jusht like everyone elsh… Hey… you drank it all!â€

Listening to Con wish that Telcia was with them was painful considering her past misconceptions of the nature of their relationship. But she also agreed with him full-heartedly. Children needed their mother and she missed her friend too. Still if Telcia had been here, Arette couldn't have beared to see Con speaking at ease with her and laughing with her when she treated Arette like something found on the sole of his boot. It was truth also that Arette had betrayed his trust badly and it was uncertain if he could even bring himself to open himself to her again. Trust was the prerequisite for love and respect and they would have to build that foundation first before anything else. Trust was mutual understanding and knowing what to expect from other people. Arette most certainly had behaved in most unpredictable way when she reacted to pain and what she had seen as a betrayal from Con's part. She believed that she had now been able to analyse why she had acted like that and could explain it to him too. If he would only listen. It wasn't adult and mature reason, but it was a reason nonetheless. And if they wanted to get anywhere with each others, Con would have to understand how different they really were and how different backgrounds they had ever since the childhood.

 

When they had been together, Con had been certain of himself as a person if not of his skills and abilities. Arette had been confident, even overly so, of what she could do and knew. But when it came to dealing with people and with deep emotions inside herself, she was closed like a mussel protecting a weak and vulnerable core. Now Con had a strong inside and outside, but Arette was still struggling with coming to terms with herself. She was forever greatful to Willamina for forcing her to examine herself like that and exposing her real flaws to her.

 

Her stream of thoughts was interrupted when Brandeis asked about Telcia. She was mentally preparing herself for the laudatory speech from Con, but he spoke of the Tower instead. Arette found herself agreeing with him in surprisingly many instances. The insulated training did indeed separate Aes Sedai from the common people. Novices performing chores did not make them truly understand what it was like for the common people working like that from day to day. It just taught the young women to develop an outer appearance of humbleness and meekness while they knew that in twenty years they would be allowed to live like queens. The Tower had lost its sight on its true purpose. Its purpose wasn't to Serve All anymore, it was to Serve the Tower. The Tower should be everywhere like the old Hall of Servants, not focused on one city. They should have outposts so that more people could approach them and they reach more people. That way they would be finding more novices too and they would be more available. Most Sisters appealed to lack of womenpower to do that, but they were blind to the fact that if the Tower didn't soon become more open, they would have even less Aes Sedai in the future.

 

And Light, the Ajahs... Getting them to agree on anything was like trying to carry the world on your back. She and Karana had tried, they had had to divide the Hall to be able to work more freely and keep the Dragon out of the Tower's reach. The Dragon needed only one advisor and even if Adelle wasn't the woman Karana and she would have chosen, she had already gotten the Dragon's trust. A wise woman used the tools available and didn't complicate things like the Hall had by trying to send an advisor from each Ajah to him. And now this brilliant stunt of Dumai's Well. The Tower had broken even worse than in Karana's time and to her knowledge coming from Telcia, there had been two opposing groups of Aes Sedai present there. The Tower had lost any hope of Him ever trusting them again.... and played him right into the pocket of Karana. She had lost the Power, but she had been helped out of humiliating life as a servant in the Tower. And Arette knew just where she was headed. She would have His ear soon enough. If only a Yellow with the right Talent could be gotten to her. Or Raina, the Dragon's Wisdom....

 

Ah, and then Con got to the Telcia. She was indeed well in tune with the common people, but if Con would ever allow himself to discuss with the villagers of Fernhill, he might get a surprising second opinion of Arette too. They were quite alarmed now of course of the revelation of her being an Aes Sedai, but she was still the same woman who had been labouring as Willamina's apprentice. Con continued and Arette thought of the good, bad and mediocre of the Tower. Which category had he thought that she belonged to before their break up? Most likely mediocre, because she had been consumed by her duty as a Keeper, obsessively even at the last months. But that was largely because of him. Her choice of course, but he had been the trigger.

 

She frowned disapprovingly when the Inquisitor slurred Con to pass him the flask. He was as drunk as a cuckoo already and ready to spill out some confessions too. It was a good thing that he had come to doubt the way of the Children, but what kind of a man became a torturer in the first place? She felt a pang of pity for him when he admitted that he hadn't enjoyed it. It was a common trick to convince oneself that the person you were doing all kind of horrible things wasn't really a human and didn't need to be treated as such. The Aes Sedai operating the Chair of Remorse sprang to mind. But they never hurt anyone permanently and the end result was law abiding citizens. Her face and heart hardened though, at his last little remark about Aes Sedai screaming just like anyone else. So, he had tortured Sisters, maybe even women she knew for Sisters she was acquintanced with had vanished in Amadicia or near by. Light shine on their souls.

 

Brandeis might be longing for a Sister to change his perception of the Aes Sedai, but after the revelations from Con his view of her was too skewered for her to ever apply. And after his little confessions, Arette had no desire to be anywhere close to him. Right now she wished only for Con to speak more or she would retire and clean herself as she was really feeling horribly sticky.

 

 

Arette

Retired Brown sistah

"Ah, you're a mess." Looking over Brandeis, Con sighed, he should have guessed the man would hit the drink quicker than him. Then again, Brandeis had alot more to block out than he did, and it'd been sometime since they'd had a drink. Once upon a time, Con reflected, he would never have had any bar with the man at all. Once a man had done something, that was that, slate was never cleaned, it marked them.

 

Brandeis had helped him realise an important lesson he'd never learnt at the Yards though. Just as important, more so even, was what a man did in the moment and intended to do. You couldn't simply judge a man by their history. "People be the same wherever you go, it just be easier to be painting them as different by the colours they do be wearing. Too often we be learning that when it be too late."

 

"A mesh? No. I haven't had nearly enough to drink!" The Inquisitor was thankful that he had 'purchased' so much of the illegally acquired beverage. It did indeed aid in loosening the tongue and it would be far kinder until the morning than any tactic employed by his fellow Inquisitors. Sobriety was all well and good for those few people whose actions caused no ripples throughout their consciences Brandeis was not so fortunate. It took several moments for him to finish several further draws on the bottle before he spoke again.

 

"Your words are wise, Con, but shome colours are jusht ... jusht ... painted with good caush." It was his turn to sigh and slump forward. "I am Brandeish Meinrad, Inquishitor of the Light and Lieutenant. I am feared for no other reashon than the symbol I wear." His hand brushed against the sunburst and crook. "My own people fear me, as do my enemiesh. Hah! But if they shee the things I have sheen, they would hold little fear of me. Many of my 'brothers'," the word was expectorated with force, "they you should be afraid of."

 

"The political struggles and bids for pershonal power gain run amuck through our ranks. All it takes is a wrong step to shee you securely attended to by one of your own. Thish is one reason why I spend more time tending my plants than in the company of other children. I am a servant of the light... or I thought I wash..."

 

It took Con a moment to make sense of what Brandeis was saying, though it was similar to what he'd heard from Brandeis before. One of the reasons that Con liked Brandeis, he actually felt guilt for what he did. Nothing was more despicable than a man who did the wrong thing, then slept soundly through the night with nothing but the feeling of justified righteousness. Nor as frightening.

 

"Why not leave them? You no be able to be denied leaving the inquisition for the soldiery. We all be Children even if our roles do be different. My Lord Captain Milah would be taking you if it be arranged I do be thinking."

 

"Leave?" Brandeis mouthed the word several times as though the thought had not occurred to him, "disgrace and duty. My father wash an Inquisihotor, my grandfather too. It would bring much harm to my family. Ash a boy, around the dinner table wash talk of animals and their punishments. It wash common, normal. I became an Inquishitor to be part of an ideal. Part of something larger than myself: something that would make a differensh in the world. I joined to make my family proud. All good in theory... not so eashily casht aside in the flesh."

 

"Unclothe a witch and she ish still a witch: she ish merely a witch dreshed like a woman. Shtill... shame would be a shmall prishe to pay for relief..." Brandeis frowned, realising for the first time that the topic under discussion was not something he wished to discuss. A brief accusatory stare followed the line of thought. "What about you, Con? Have you found what you were sheeking amongst ush?"

 

"I be knowing I be helping people. I do be wishing every Child be doing the same is all. A leader worth serving..." Con drifted off in thought at that. Valorn Goldren, he was a good man, yet he was a man who fought the wrong battles, the wrong enemies. He also compromised, but then he didn't need to consider that anymore, it wasn't his place. He only need consider the men who travelled with him, and keeping them safe while they did what was needed.

 

"I mean no dishreshpect when I ask this. But can we trust your witch friend? Shay we help her. Well and good. Then shay she decides to tell shomeone. It would not be well for ush in the end. She could be removed quiet like, without no one knowing the wisher." His attempt to draw his thumb across his throat met with some success but the effort caused him to drop the bottle, the contents of which quickly sunk into the earth.

 

Con went still when what Brandeis said made sense to him. If Brandeis hadn't been as incredibly drunk as he was, as evidenced by the fact he'd drunk the bottle, Con might have possibly spoken 'forcefully' to him. On the otherhand, Brandeis was drunk, and it was the liquor talking. Getting up, he walked over and picked up the bottle. Pouring the rest of it out, Con let his action speak of how much he disapproved of that idea in conjunction with a single syllable. "No."

 

"On that note... there ish something I musht take 'care' of..." More or less getting to his feet, Brandeis headed toward and disappeared into the trees. There was a sharp cracking sound, a shriek and several minutes later the Inquisitor emerged with twigs stuck in his hair and the front of his tabard covered in soil and smears of green. "Much better."

 

Rolling his eyes, Con gestured for the man to pick up the wood they'd gathered and took a rather circuitous route back to the camp, Con picking up sticks and giving them to Brandeis to carry. Not that it stopped Brandeis from tripping at least two more times rather painfully. At least, it would have been painful if he wasn't already rather drunk.

 

As they reached the camp, Con stopped in his tracks even as Brandeis walked over to the fire with the sticks. Luca, at Arette's tent, disappearing inside. Clenching and unclenching his fists, snapping a couple of the sticks he was holding, it was startled shouts by the fire that woke his reverie. Light but Brandeis was even drunker than he'd imagined, the idiot had thrown all the sticks he was carrying onto the fire. Shaking his head as the man staggered to his tent telling everyone not to thank him, Con dropped the sticks close to the fire to be fed into it and retired to his own tent, in silence.

 

 

Con Stavros

Child of the Light

Light, but Brandeis was wasted. Some people were like that. Put little booze on their belly and they would sink down more like sponges. She didn't think that it had to do with growing more resilient, but it was inherent. And while people were intoxicated, they showed their true colours. She didn't very much appreciate the colours this Brandeis fellow was presenting so far. She listened him ramble on and agreed with him that he wasn't quite as fearsome as the Inquisitors she had heard of. The Fortress of the Light was surely as political hotbed as the White Tower with its two branhces and as the real nobility of Amadicia, the Children surely attracted individuals with all kinds of ambitions. He had at least some taste, avoiding his fellows for the most part when he just could.

 

Con's suggestion about quitting as an Inquisitor seemed to surprise him as if he had never even considered it. The family tradition explained it, though. So he was truly mislead since childhood. It was a surprise that he hadn't become the monster his father and grandfather obviously were. But no one could walk too far from the mercy of Light, no matter what they had done. She wished that Brandeis would leave his side of the order and not tarnish his soul further. Then Brandeis asked something that she had wanted to know ever since finding out about Con's new affiliation. Why was he siding with the Chilrden? Arette would have guessed him to head to the Borderlands after his departure. It had been his dream and the reason why he had originally came to the Yards to train.

 

By his reply, he had maybe grown a little wiser indeed and less eager to throw his life away. He was no use to the world dead. His longing for a good leader was pretty telling. That was why the White Tower had lost him. Due to inaction and because of the male channeler issue. It had been last straw. Arette still believed that what they had done had been necessary. The male channelers caught hadn't been much help so far, and the other a disaster in fact, but still the change of Gentling Law had made it much easier to get along with the Dragon. In theory since those flaming wool-heads in the Hall had decided to kidnap him.

 

Her thoughts were interfered by a slurred suggestion to kill her off like another lamb off slaughter. So, that was the real nature of Brandeis, doing away ruthlessly with inconveniences. It took Con a long moment to reply, but the unwavering no assured Arette that he was still the same old honourable man as before. She was just about to turn away, certain that she had heard everything coherent there was to be learned, when Brandeis decided to make a move into the woods right toward her. Her heart skipped a few beats, before she unceremoniusly ducked behind the bushes.

 

Brandeis didn't venture very far luckily and after some rumbling and rustling around that Arette was glad to not witness, he emerged back to Con. By then she was slowly crawling back to the camp, cursing the stone-brained drunkard for getting her nightgown to even worse condition. She could hear their stumbling walk and Brandeis' oaths and determined that it was safe to stand up and walk. Light, but she was in need of a thorough bath... and the best they could currently offer was a bucket of water from the spring nearby. As she approached the camp, she noticed to her delight that Luca still awake, keeping company to the guards by the fire. Keeping her cloak wrapped tight around herself to keep them from seeing the mud-stained dress under it, she approached the men with greetings. When the pleasantries had been exchanged, she pulled Luca aside to ask him for a favour. As a gentleman, he naturally granted it and she could retreat to her tent with relief to wait for him.

 

Soon enough he entered with the bucket, a polite rap on the tent poles giving a warning.

 

"Is there anything else you desire of me tonight, Lini?", he asked. Arette wasn't certain if he had meant all the connotations she was reading into his words, but she blushed violently blessing the darkness in the tent. Light, they hardly even knew each others. And even though he was fine company, she wasn't going to repeat the mistake she had done with Con, bedding a man before they could be certain of the match and their emotions.... not even Con again, if such a miracle happened one day.

 

"I... uhh... thank you, Luca, but that is all. I really need to get refreshed, so could you please...." He got the message and with a final wish for sweet dreams left her to her own devices.