"Romance aside, are you the type of woman who would be willing to shave my back?"

I actually like Bad Puns.

 

A cunning linguist once offered the sage advice: "Keep your mind out of the guttural, the results could be plosive."

 

Were I ever approached with that caliber of Bad Pun, I'm certain we would click. Like an aspirated bilabial, baby.

Lol :-O

 

"Does this rag smell like cloroform to you?"

 

"Wow, that's really interesting. But enough about you. Seriously."

 

"I'm sorry about my choppy moustache. Can you teach me how you shave yours?"

 

"Would you like to come to the Family Reunion? You can meet my Mom, Aunt, Cousin, Sister. She's really a great gal."

 

THREAD WINNAH

 

Thank you.

 

 

"Hey baby that dress is amazing! It would look even better as a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor!"

 

"My mom won't be home for hours..."

 

"You're hotter than my daughter."

 

"You're hotter than my daughter."

 

._.

Lmao

 

"...but I bet you and my daughter would be bff's in no time. Want to text her?"

Lmao

 

"...but I bet you and my daughter would be bff's in no time. Want to text her?"

 

:-O Lol.

"Hope you don't mind that I brought all of my kids with. Hey everyone, say hello to your new mommy!"

"Hope you don't mind that I brought all of my kids with. Hey everyone, say hello to your new mommy!"

 

ROTFL!!!

"So, since you're not bound and gagged like my last date, I suppose I have to talk to you. What're you like?"

 

"Wow, you're nothing like I thought you were. I mean, the pictures I took of you from the tree behind your house say nothing about your personality!"

 

"Would you wear a furry costume tonight?"

"Do you roleplay? Would you be opposed to, say, a love affair between Spock and Wonder Woman? I'll wear the cape..."

"Sometimes I lay down and pretend to be the road."

"I can't walk over bridges. The temptations to jump is too great."

*You don't mind rubber sheets, do you? I sort of need them for my... problem..."

I'd love to follow you home, but I gotta stop at the comic book store first. There's a midnight release of the new Sponge Bob comic and I'm not missing that!

I don't know about that. Some of the funnest dates I've ever had were in comic/hobby shops and they were her idea. But I'd have a hard time dating a Spongebob fan. That's a mental barrier I could never get around.

I don't know about that. Some of the funnest dates I've ever had were in comic/hobby shops and they were her idea. But I'd have a hard time dating a Spongebob fan. That's a mental barrier I could never get around.

 

Yeah, that sounds fun, going to hobby shop for a date. I'd like it but no Spongebob.

Dedicated to Naked Frog!

 

I have a friend sleeping over for the third night in a row :D

 

"How good do you look tied to a chair?"

Hahah, who says I gave them a chair? I just chained them to the basement wall :D

"We don't use safe words in my Dungeon. I decide when you've had enough."

"We don't use safe words in my Dungeon. I decide when you've had enough."

 

 

ROTFL!!!!

LOL that'll do it, I think...

LOL that'll do it, I think...

 

That's the best one, I think!

"You don't mind me wearing a cape every other day do you?"

To quote Dr. Sheldon Cooper: "I'm not crazy. My mother had me tested."

 

 

"Let me show you my Pokemons."

 

 

"Have you ever wondered what it'd be like to become a serial killer? Murder must have some form of appeal if they keep going back to it... Does anyone know that you're here?"

 

 

"Oh, I already know where you live."

 

 

"We don't use safe words in my Dungeon. I decide when you've had enough."

 

 

Lol! Those were my favorite ones, this thread was very amusing.

 

 

"It's so nice to talk to a real person again."

"I'm really into 'anger painting' now. My new one is titled 'Mother."

 

"Better eat this or they'll steal your thoughts too."

 

"Is it just me or does every cloud look like a severed torso?"