THE SOULS OF BROKEN RANDLANDERS WITH THE MISGUIDED AND EASILY MANIPULATED IDEOLOGY OF THE SEANCHAN EMPIRE. WITH A NICE SIDE OF CUCUMBER SALAD.

 

DO, What is the root of all evil? And do you ever wash that thing?

Ohhhh.... Ninja'd by the Kiteh.

IT IS ALL ACORDING TO MY GRAND PLAN. ARE YOU UNHAPPY? THEN MY MISSION HAS BEEN ACCOMPLISHED.

 

DO, What is the root of all evil? And do you ever wash that thing?

sorry

the lust for life. and yes. in the blood of the innocents. are you not paying attention?

 

do... if you can only provide eternal life sans joy... why would anyone consign himself to your service?

JOY IS AN EMOTIONAL ROLLERCOASTER. YOU CANNOT HAVE IT WITHOUT PAIN TO UNDERLINE IT'S ACTUAL EXISTENCE. PLUS, I GOT A MIX CD OF 80'S PARTY JAMS THAT YOU WILL LOVE ALWAYS. AND COOKIES.

 

Dark One, why haven't you already beaten the light?

because i love the game and who else would i play with? and the creator isn't actually beatable, having created me and all, and the pattern besides. really don't get the why, i think it amuses him to see you all suffer.

 

do, why did the creator bother to put a gorgeous fruit tree in the middle of the garden when he knew damn well what would happen? is he as much of a jerk as you?

THAT TREE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A TEST FOR HUMANS. YOU FAILED ON DAY ONE. AND YEAH, HE'S A TOTAL JERK-A-SAURUS. RAWR

 

 

Dark One, Is Shadar Haran one of the dead Forsaken reintergrated?

he is my precious, and you just back off him, you understand???

 

DO, why would the creator need to test his creation? he knows the outcome. he knew it. what was in it for him, and why are you so much easier to understand?

THE TEST WAS ABOUT FREE WILL AND SUCH. HE WANTED TO KNOW IF BEINGS CREATED IN HIS IMAGE WOULD BE ULTIMATELY CORRUPTABLE. WHAT WAS IN IT FOR HIM? HE JUST WANTED TO PISS ME OFF. HE IS A VINDICTIVE CUSS.

 

ANDTHE BIG VOICE IS EASILY INTERPRETED

 

Dark One, what do you have faith in?

in the love of god. which should tell you something about his standards. but no... there is no free will, none to speak of. worms you are to me and sheep to him. he may be a good shepherd but... no. no free will, you poor sods.

 

DO.... if i give you a tiny bit of my soul can do something about this overtaxed server, it's making me crazy,

PLEASE DEFINE A TINY BIT...REGADLESS, THIS ALL PART OF MY PLAN. DESPAIR - ALL WHO ENTER HERE. HERE THERE BE MONSTERS.

 

DO, Why do we search for answers where there are none. And are you an 'ancient alien'?

good lord, no. i am from this planet. why would you question that? just think of the cost of getting here and the benefit/cost analysis should make it plain, no aliens come here. none. forget you ever thought it. I COMMAND THEE.

 

you search for answers because in making you as himself the creator gave you the thirst for knowledge, for truth, for wisdom... but not the means of achieving it, the SOB. how long, babe, can you search for what is not lost?

 

....the tiny little part that's so blackened with despair that i will not miss it. more than half i should think.

 

DO, what's up with the goldschlager working so dang well?

 

also... OBEY! FIX THE SERVER! I COMPEL THEE, LORD OF DARKNESS. I COMMAND AND COMPELL AND PERSUADE THEE! FIX IT NOW!

 

*cough*

 

erm... pretty please with sugar on it.

WOW, OK...

I CAN SEARCH A LONG TIME. LONG TIME - ALBEIT A FRIUTLESS ENDEAVOR.

I LIKE MY SOULS LIKE I LIKE MY CHICKEN WINGS, BLACKEND AND DRIPPING WITH THE JUICES...

ITS THE GOLD THAT MAKES IT BOLD. IT ALSO IS THE ELEMENT THAT IS SLOWLY POISONING YOU< SO IT'S ALL GOOD

 

DO, are you glorified by these questions we ask in your honor?

i am glorified by nothing, i am despair. i am the child lost and screaming for salvation. i am nothing., i am all. there is no glory here. you are thinking of a buffy arc. here there is only nothingness, blackness, the surcease os all that is good and light but also of all that is pain and fire and hatred and misery.

 

no glory. only death. no hope/

 

see the other guy for that. i think he has a better compounded interest rate.

 

DO,. is it the gold, or is it the sugar and high ETOH content?

ITS A BRUTAL COMBO OF ALL THREE, BUT WE ENJOY WATCHING YOU DEGENERATE INTO A GLODEN FOG. THE SERVER DOES MY BIDDING AS WELL.

 

Dark One, are you responsibe for the technology that is keeping us from the truth?

BEFORE YOU RECEIVE MORE ANSWERS, YOU MUST PERFORM A TASK: THE DARK ONE DEMANDS.... A SHRUBBERY!

 

Dark One, why was the game Mafia invented?

AS A PLOT TO PROTECT THE SHRUBBERIES.

 

 

Dark One, Is it really just a flesh wound?

IT IS, I'VE HAD WORSE.

 

Dark One, who is your favorite comedian?

BARAK OBAMA. THE GUY KILLS ME...

 

Dark One, Is spanking someone considered good form if they deserve it?

SPANKING IS A FORM OF CHILD ABUSE, BUT IT'S GOOD FOR THE ADULTS.

 

Dark One, Can I be one of the Chosen? Please?

you ever really read up on what happens to chosen people? ok, fine, a year with a rabbi and a very painful ceremony and you're in. don;t know why anyone wants in that club but sure.

 

DO.... something is happening here and i don;t know what it is. Do you, mr. One?

I TOO SENSE A DISTURNACE OR A FLUCTUATION IN THE NORM HERE. IS IT A BY-PRODUCT OF SOMETHING I HAVE BEGUN THAT HAS SPUN OUT OF CONTROL? I AM NOT SURE. IT IS DEFINATELY TAINT ORIENTED THOUGH.

 

Dark One, What say you regarding cookies?