This is how it works: the first person makes a wish and then the next person grants the wish, but with some kind of corruption. Then the second person makes their own wish and the next person corrupts it, and so on. 

 

Example:

User1: I wish I could fly.

User2: Granted, but you can only fly one feet off the ground. 

 I wish for a million dollars.

User3: Granted, but it's Monopoly money.

I wish for an unlimited supply of tainted brownies.

 

 

 

 

 

I wish for a dragon. 

Your dragon eats you.

 

I wish the weather was always nice...

Granted, but you'll have to live inside a cave, never allowed to go outside. 

 

I wish for a Tardis.

It appears and lands right on top of you, squishing you like the Wicked Witch of the East. At least your fabulous shoes are spared

 

I wish it was this time next year already.

 

Granted, but you find out that the world has been invaded by clones of Jar Jar Binks. 

 

I wish it wasn't so hot outside.

Granted. You now live in Antarctica

 

I wish that I win the powerball drawing tonight.

Granted. In a bizarre fluke, 98 Million other people also win and you get 50p each.

 

I wish I knew what was going to happen.

Granted. You forget it two seconds after. 

 

I wish I had Storm's powers (X-Men).

Granted, but you can't control them. Hellooo, sky-high home insurance rates.

 

I wish I had a pet dragon.

Granted, but... DRACARYS! 

 

I wish for some tainted brownies.

granted, you can have them but can't eat them

 

I wish it was my birthday every day

*waves magic wand*

Everybody makes you cakes every day and it's just like that episode of the Vicar of Dibley where Geraldine has to eat lots of christmas dinners because she's too nice to say no and eventually you explode.

 

I wish for nutella.

Granted.

 

But it taste of vegemite.

 

I wish I live on Pern

Granted. The Red Planet passes over and a Thread lands on your head and kills you.

 

I wish that I had all the books back that I sold two years ago.

Granted. But in the meantime someone has taken all the pages out, mixed them all up and them stuck them back in random books so they don't make sense any more.

 

I wish for some breakfast

Granted.

 

*gives you Snake Surprise*

 

 

 

I wish that I had someone to help me.

Granted.

 

The help is a psycho who made your life a living hell

 

I wish I had wings

Granted, but they're made of paper and you can't fly.

 

I wish I had blue eyes.

*takes a narrow needle and injects blue dye into both of your eyes*

 

 

 

I wish I could have chinese takeaway for tea tonight.

OH GOD.

*uses a language that could compete with Uno's usual speech*

 

Granted, but you won't be able to eat anything different for the next twenty years. 

 

I wish for some strawberries.

*uses a language that could compete with Uno's usual speech*

 

Granted, but you won't be able to eat anything different for the next twenty years.

 

I wish for some strawberries.

 

Hmmm, that's not to bad. After all Chinese people eat it every day

 

 

Granted. Tragically you also gain a severe allergic reaction to them and your hands and feet swell to twice their usual size. And it's permanent.

 

 

I wish I didn't have to listen to this 20 minute sales call.

Indeed, but if you have any crave you won't be able to satisfy it 

That's true ...

 

Ans as my wish wasn't fulfilled I had to listen to that call - and it was awful.

 

So ... a new wish

 

I wish that the Training I have to do this morning is not too boring and dull.

granted... They decided to hold it at 30,000 feet and teach everyone HALO para-jumping at the same time.

Your 'chute doesn't open :(

 

 

I wish my computer was sentient.