A crazy man in the crazy tower - can´t get much better. Welcome, Yates! 

 

Sit down and wait for people to bring you tainted brownies. While waiting, you can tell us all about yourself. Have you read the books? Why is Death riding on a pony? Do you get any sleep these days?

 

 

*takes some hair*

 

 

 

YATES!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

This has been a long time coming... It's time you succumbed to your inevitable madness and sunk down into the bliss of the taint along with the rest of us...

 

(We even have liquid pure taint for drinking... no lies..)

 

Welcome

And here I thought, let's wait until he makes a post without ending it with a question mark... Oh well.

 

Welcome Yates.

There are no question marks!!!! 

No question marks allowed in the BT!

Welcome?

 

See, they are too allowed.

 

Some bacon brownies for your welcome

 

welcome yates. 

 

I did see my shout out in the champ game. tyvm.

Ah Yates,

 

Seen you around the site but great to see you joining the BT!  Sit your grim reaper pony flank down and tell us a bit about yourself while absorbing the taint this place is so well known for!

*steals the Yates*

 

Muahahaha MY TRAP WORKED!

 

Has he actually joined do you think? The phasing was imprecise and I think it's probably a fake claim considering the source.

[v]yates[/v]

I'll never play again but there's not a game I've read that I haven't wanted to do that.

 

I'm an old school LALer.

 

But welcome to the BT nonetheless!

[v] Cindy [/v]

 

You're basing your read SOLELY on meta without even looking at his posts in this thread?

Yates, I am waiting for you to confirm joining BT before I welcome you

Confirmed joiner.

 

What's a "book?"

*Yates slowly emerges from his beer cellar carrying a pitch black bottle with a blood red wax sealed cap and a light coating of dust indicating it has been down there for some time. The care with which he sets the bottle down on the walnut trimmed turquoise counter top and wipes the dust away as if caressing an old lover evokes an immediate understanding that this is a *special* bottle. With one twist of his wrist the wax seal has been expertly removed and in what appears to be a precision choreographed routine the cap is wiped clean with one hand while a metal opener appears in his other and a flick of his thumb elicits an effervescent hiss of carbonation as the contents mingles with air for the first time in who knows how long. He pulls two crystal clear 7 ounce snifter glasses from seemingly out of nowhere and begins to pour the first glass. A pitch black cola colored beverage pools into the snifter slowly filling with a combination of the black liquid and a dark tan froth that forms from within the carbonated delight. He fills until the glass is 2/3 full and allows a frothy tan head to form and creep towards the lip of the glass. This procedure is completed a second time. The first glass, as is customary, is offered to you, his guest.

 

This is a 2007 Goose Island Bourbon County Stout. There may be a dozen bottles of this left in the world. I have two remaining.

 

*He holds his glass up to yours and touches snifters before taking a moment to inhale the sweet malty slightly bourbon scented beer with subtle notes of vanilla and oak. You take your first sip and allow the beer to fill your mouth and bathe your tongue in a viscous cacophony of rich complex flavors. Yes. This is the beer you had hoped it would be. A beer by which all others will be judged and fall short. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity. You try desperately to remember everything about the experience before sucking down the last drops from the glass.

 

*Yates smirks with a knowing look.

 

Don't worry, friend. Have I ever told you about this Belgian beer I have been ageing? Might be 6 bottles left in the world...

*uncorks straight Taint, passes it to Yates, and triple dog dares him not to snicker*

 

Srsly, drink up Johnny.... Until any of this makes sense.

*doesn't read any of that*

 

Not sure if that post means wheter you're at the perfect place or wheter you're not yet tainted enough.

Anyways, welcome.

*puts replenishing weave on bottles*

 

We believe in conserving rare things

Confirmed joiner.

 

What's a "book?"

 

*happens to drop AMoL on Yates´ head*

 

That is a book! 

*puts replenishing weave on bottles*

 

We believe in conserving rare things

 

**Laughs **

You consider taint to be rare around here? I mean, we taint the taint with more taint so we can increase our taintedness!

 

Confirmed joiner.

 

What's a "book?"

 

*happens to drop AMoL on Yates´ head*

 

That is a book! 

 

 

Ow! That's just mean. I mean, I'm not dropping a tree on your head either, am I?

 

 

*puts replenishing weave on bottles*

 

We believe in conserving rare things

 

**Laughs **

You consider taint to be rare around here? I mean, we taint the taint with more taint so we can increase our taintedness!

 

 

Taint is ALWAYS too rare.

I literally don't know what you are talking about.  When you say "taint" I'm thinking that I'm thinking about something *completely* different.  Like... a section of the body... on a man...

Care to delve deeply into my Taint, Yates?

 

That stout sounds amazing. I've been looking to get into the darker, maltier stuff as of late. Got any suggestions?