Oh great DO, I bring you these homemade chocolate-chip cookies!

*Grovel*

I bring you oh DO a shrubbery and a mulcher

I have Angelina Jolie in my basement! ;D

 

Surprisingly she hasn't helped much in getting me points before.   :-\

 

:o

 

*runs to Tig's basement*

 

I renounce you, Oh Dark One.  I hereby submit my soul to Angelina.  Nae, it'll be yours shortly.  But Angelina gets it now.

 

Yes.  It.

 

Giggity.

*18 seconds later*

 

*lights a cigarette*

 

Damn I'm good.

I bring you oh DO verbal who has wasted your time and effort for a double post

Oh Great Lord hast thou forsaken us? The throng grovels awaiting thee.

 

Great Lord! Great Lord! where for art thou Great Lord! We breathlessly await thee, anticipating the ecstacy of thou's ministrations.

I've got Angelina dressed up like a School girl  ;)

 

As a matter of fact....I'll be back. ;D

 

*kicks Verby out*

 

Oh great... you. I bring you a free back scratch performed by... well, me. I'm not gonna describe what I'm wearing.

 

1 point for the backscratch.  2 more for not describing what you're wearing

Oh Great Lord hast thou forsaken us? The throng grovels awaiting thee.

 

Great Lord! Great Lord! where for art thou Great Lord! We breathlessly await thee, anticipating the ecstacy of thou's ministrations.

 

Shabbos and work are combining to constrain me to the bore(dom of the temporary restraining order brief)

I bring you oh DO verbal who has wasted your time and effort for a double post

 

Hmmm . . . someone already brought me Verbal.  0 points

I bring you oh DO a shrubbery and a mulcher

 

1 point.  4 more if you bring me another shrubbery, and place it here beside this shrubbery, only slightly higher so you get a two-level effect with a little path running down the middle.

 

[with love, the Dark One who Says ekki-ekki-ekki-pitang-zoom-boing]

Oh great DO, I bring you these homemade chocolate-chip cookies!

*Grovel*

 

*Assumes they are kosher*

 

3 points.

Now, if you'll just follow me this way, Amadine . . .

*follows meekly*

 

Oh My Great Lord!!!!

 

*Floats back to where the others wait with their gifts*

 

That... you... were amazing Great Lord! *snickers*

 

For that i bring you my famous home-made chicken parmigiana with baked potatoes and fresh crusty bread rolls... oh and a large ice cold mug of beer.... to get your strength back ;)

 

*uses true source to render it kosher*

 

3 points

Oh great lord, I bring you the one known as "Big Bird" to entertain those adorable evil err... little ones of yours! If he does not please them, he is also ripe for the plucking and I shall chop off his head and make him for dinner for yourself and the family! *curtsies*

 

OOOH - multipurpose.  I like multipurpose.

 

4 points

I bring you all who oppose you oh DO, even if they haven't thought about it yet

 

*decapitates all*

 

That was an excellent final act for your life, BadCo.  5 points, since you lost your head.

Oh Great Lord, Exalted One and All-Around Great God, I bring you fresh blood!

 

*points at the Bird toting woman creature*

 

Who the hell do you think I am, Robert Pattinson?  Fresh blood, really?

 

0 points, and minus another two for making me think about twilight

What about the Gift Giver, O great DO?

*is rooting heavily for the great Kivam*

 

Great and Glorious DO, I bring you the gift of the Gift Giver.  The Gift Giver is a robot that brings WHATEVER you ask of it as a gift for you.

However, if you find this insufficient, I also bring you a shrubbery slightly higher than the one given to you earlier and place it beside the smaller shrubbery.

Oh great and wonderful DO I bring you an evil optician who shall serve the world with lenses for their glasses that will bring them under your will unknowingly. They shall serve your every whim without even knowing it.

 

And the optician doubles as a footrest for your aching feet.

Oh magnificent DO! I bring you Batman to guard your palace, as well as an electric hedge trimmer to deal with anyone who dare come close to your splendor.

 

*grovels*

Great Lord, since Angelina alone doesn't do it for you...I got Jennifer Aniston and they shall have a mud fight to determine which one gets to serve you!  ;D

I'm not much into writhing so...

 

*thinks about it*

 

Hmm...the best way to avoid writhing...please the DO?

 

Yes, hmm...indeed...*writes things down on a clipboard*

 

*hands the DO the best gift ever that said DO would give 10 trillion points for*

 

>.>

 

<.<

Oh great Dark One I bring you edward cullens head on a platter! (I balefired the rest of his body off)

 

(And, notice I did not capitalize his name like I did Yours!)

Oh great and lawyery DO, I bring you an offer to give you as many points as you give me.

So, you just gave him NOTHING? This ought to be fun to watch.  :P

 

Oh, great DO, I bring you many great delicacies. One from each region you could possibly ever choose to visit, and a beautiful maiden to serve them to you.

 

And Ed on a leash, just because it's 2funy.  ;)

 

DO, I bring you a button to transform all colored fonts into black so that your eyes don't hurt reading them, like mine do.  ;)

 

Oh, and Tigs.  Please give me Angelina.  Really.  I'll give you the Dark One for her.  Uhhh.....

 

*tries to look meek*

 

Just a joke, eh?  Dark One?  Sightblinder?  Leafblower?  Hedgetrimmer?  Hello?

 

Geesh.

 

*walks off*