What about the Gift Giver, O great DO?

*is rooting heavily for the great Kivam*

 

Great and Glorious DO, I bring you the gift of the Gift Giver.  The Gift Giver is a robot that brings WHATEVER you ask of it as a gift for you.

 

Essentially, you got me a gift card?

 

That bespeaks a lack of creativity.  -1 point.

 

However, if you find this insufficient, I also bring you a shrubbery slightly higher than the one given to you earlier and place it beside the smaller shrubbery.

 

Beautiful.  3 points

Oh magnificent DO! I bring you Batman to guard your palace, as well as an electric hedge trimmer to deal with anyone who dare come close to your splendor.

 

*grovels*

 

Na na na na na na na na 5 points, 5 points, 5 points (well, not 15, but the verse requires repetition)

Great Lord, since Angelina alone doesn't do it for you...I got Jennifer Aniston and they shall have a mud fight to determine which one gets to serve you!  ;D

 

Nice (though Jen's about to get her butt kicked).  4 points.

I'm not much into writhing so...

 

*thinks about it*

 

Hmm...the best way to avoid writhing...please the DO?

 

Yes, hmm...indeed...*writes things down on a clipboard*

 

*hands the DO the best gift ever that said DO would give 10 trillion points for*

 

>.>

 

<.<

 

Another gift card??

 

-2 points

Oh great Dark One I bring you edward cullens head on a platter! (I balefired the rest of his body off)

 

(And, notice I did not capitalize his name like I did Yours!)

 

Picks up the subtle hints.  Nicely done.

 

3 points

DO, I bring you a button to transform all colored fonts into black so that your eyes don't hurt reading them, like mine do.  ;)

 

Oh look, it worked.  5 points.

Oh great and lawyery DO, I bring you an offer to give you as many points as you give me.

 

I have access to the Bore. Give me points, and you'll receive your just reward.

So, you just gave him NOTHING? This ought to be fun to watch.  :P

 

Oh, great DO, I bring you many great delicacies. One from each region you could possibly ever choose to visit, and a beautiful maiden to serve them to you.

 

And Ed on a leash, just because it's 2funy.  ;)

 

 

5 points

*humps the DO's leg*

 

Oh Great DO....I'll stop for points.

 

:D

 

Also...I blame Lily...this was her plan.

*leashes Eddie and produces a VERY large studded paddle*

 

Oh Great Lord of the Dark! I give you this paddle to take to Eddie with, and he's leashed so he cannot escape til you are done tanning his hide!

Oh great DO I have done as you commanded.

*leashes Eddie and produces a VERY large studded paddle*

 

Oh Great Lord of the Dark! I give you this paddle to take to Eddie with, and he's leashed so he cannot escape til you are done tanning his hide!

o_0

You're serious?

You want him to make it worse?

 

Oh Grezt DO...look at the Heathen. She wants to make your life miserable.

 

"And theees, theees ees Ed2funy.  Appreciate eet from a deestahnce, prolonged expozhure can be paynful"

*leashes Eddie and produces a VERY large studded paddle*

 

Oh Great Lord of the Dark! I give you this paddle to take to Eddie with, and he's leashed so he cannot escape til you are done tanning his hide!

o_0

You're serious?

You want him to make it worse?

 

Oh Grezt DO...look at the Heathen. She wants to make your life miserable.

 

"And theees, theees ees Ed2funy.  Appreciate eet from a deestahnce, prolonged expozhure can be paynful"

 

The paddle has a very long handle Great Lord *nods*  LMAO

Oh powerful DO, I bring you Edward Cullen's lover/human/thing to use in torture of those who do not praise you. I figure you can show her the head of her lover, and she will annoy everyone within hearing with her thoughtless narrations of her dull life. Of course one of you minions would handle her, so you didn't have to be reminded of the hateful movie.

 

I offer Ed up as the creature handler, seeing as how we don't care if he is annoyed anyways. ^_^

Amadine still doesn't understand.

She isn't worthy of being in your presence, oh Great DO!!!!!

 

*Looks at the woman creature*

Nooooooooooooooooooo.......

O great DO. I offer myself. I will gladly save you the trouble of using Amadine's paddle, and offer to beat Ed for you myself. Let me sweat for your pleasure, O Great One!

 

*produces Dominatrix attire* And Great One, I am experienced in producing the maximum amount of pain without allowing the subject to lose consciousness.

 

 

Oh Great and All-Knowing DO.....

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

LET HER!!!

:D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

Oh my goodness Ed, I'm not sure if I should be mad or laugh... Actually..

 

*cuts Ed in line* You can live through wanting Lily to spank torture you if I get to go first! ;D

I bring you oh DO a shrubbery and a mulcher

 

1 point.  4 more if you bring me another shrubbery, and place it here beside this shrubbery, only slightly higher so you get a two-level effect with a little path running down the middle.

 

[with love, the Dark One who Says ekki-ekki-ekki-pitang-zoom-boing]

I bring you oh DO another shrubberry to place beside the other shrubberry only slightly higher for a two level effect. ;D

*Rick Roll's all of the DO's enemies*

 

*waits for DO approval*

Just a rickroll my good sir, you should have rick astley follow them around non-stop singing it over and over again

Fabulous and exotic DO! I bring you this diaper changing robot, in case you don't feel like doing it. As well as Inigo Montoya and Westley to provide some swordplay to entertain the courtiers.

 

*bows and bows again*

*bows and bows until he hits 88 miles per hour bowing speed so he can go back to the future and remove all inconveniences in the DO's way for all eternity*

 

*comes back and kneels at the DO's feet*

Just a rickroll my good sir, you should have rick astley follow them around non-stop singing it over and over again

 

Ah, yes...quite...

 

*does so*

 

*hopes that these actions has pleased the DO*

 

*if not...*hands slim jim to almighty DO**

 

*humps the DO's leg*

 

Oh Great DO....I'll stop for points.

 

:D

 

Also...I blame Lily...this was her plan.

 

Bad ed.  Bad Ed!

 

-5 points

*leashes Eddie and produces a VERY large studded paddle*

 

Oh Great Lord of the Dark! I give you this paddle to take to Eddie with, and he's leashed so he cannot escape til you are done tanning his hide!

 

Good Ami, Good Ami!

 

5 points  ;)