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Talking Aloud to Animals (Things My Cats Make Me Say)

Songstress
Songstress
in The Black Tower

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"I fail to see the attraction in drinking hot, soapy bathwater. Weirdo."

#thingsmycatsmakemesay

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    "I am not interested in having a cat fight on top of me at 5:30 AM. Do you understand me?"

    #thingsmycatsmakemesay

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    "Kate. You do not need more plastic in your diet. No, you do not."

    #thingsmycatsmakemesay

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    "Daww... Cute, fuzzy little predator."

    #thingsmycatsmakemesay

     

    This came with a photo:

    1d8qla.jpg

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    "You are far too fat to jump on my head. Don't even think about it."

    #thingsmycatsmakemesay

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    "I'm very proud of the great strides you're making in not being a complete weirdo."

    #thingsmycatsmakemesay

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    "Yes, you're very sweet and lovey. Pardon me if I'm skeptical, you did just try to bite my forehead."

    #thingsmycatsmakemesay

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    "Did you seriously just sigh at me? Am I boring you?"

    #thingsmycatsmakemesay

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    "Dude. If you're going to puke, get off my stuff."

    #thingsmycatsmakemesay

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    "Why is your butt on my head? Oh, that's right. You're a butthead."

    #thingmycatsmakemesay

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    "What are you telling the neighbors all about now?"

    #thingsmycatsmakemesay

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    "Can I please interest you in not being in my way?"

    #thingsmycatsmakemesay

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    "Did I say I wanted a kitty? Did I? Hmm? Ok, FINE. I have a kitty."

    #thingsmycatsmakemesay

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    "Do you mind settling down, please? And by settling down, I do not mean "smashing my arm". Thank you."

    #thingsmycatsmakemesay

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    "Look at you, all up in my face, with your big big eyes... and ears... pointed back. Are you trying to steal my soul?"

    #thingsmycatsmakemesay

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    "Aww, patting my face... how very cute. PLEASE RETRACT YOUR CLAWS."

    #thingsmycatsmakemesay

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    "Do you have any idea how much I want you to shut up?"

    #thingsmycatsmakemesay

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    "Aww, good morning lover boy! Such love... so sweet... so... please don't bite my forehead >.<"

    #thingsmycatsmakemesay

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    "What is this, a hostile takeover? Have we not had this discussion? MY PILLOW!"

    #thingsmycatsmakemesay

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    "Hello! Your name is Kittygo Monkitty. You are lying on the bed cutely. Prepare to be smooched."

    #thingsmycatsmakemesay #princessbride

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